Parth,

His ineffective strategies aren’t really the “step one” issue, right? The victim parth, the agitated parth, is. His skillful or unskillful qualities are his business, and he has no obligation to change them. But, yes, his behavior sounds pokey, which isn’t typically good for us. Again, though, this is like judging a cat for being a cat, as soon as you entertain “well, he shouldn’t…”. The truth is, he does, and he does for some kind of reason. You have no obligation to understand, accept, or change those reasons, or invite him in, that’s between you and your heart, what feels best for you.

As far as being invaded more, such as, if he comes to dinner, perhaps he’d be more agitating… its true. But that’s what family does to each other, you know? I have an uncle that pushes tons of buttons in all of us, and because he’s family, we feel comfortable telling him to shut up if he’s being a jerk. Sometimes he does, sometimes he doesn’t, but we never feel like a victim. See? 🙂

With warmth,
Matt