Thank you everyone for your support and thoughtful words/wisdom. Sorry I don’t know how to reply to individual comments.

@Krista Jennings – Your words “gratitude can highlight the disconnect between where you want to be and where you are but it sheds some light and perspective” touched my heart.

@Inky – My situation was blurred to me by my guilt of lying. Seeing and understanding from a strangers perspective had shed some light. You are right about the deal breaker. And I thank you for understanding that “was a response to unrelenting stress”. I was scared to write on this forum thinking that maybe people will think I am hiding or using his health to hide my imperfections.

@MP – Thank you for guiding me to this site that made me understand myself a little better.