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Hi Kate,
The end of a relationship is a devastating experience and I would like to thank you for having the courage to share your feelings with the world. Please know that you have my unconditional love and support.
When my marriage ended I was a blubbering mess for weeks. We had moved at the other end of the country to be closer to his family and the prospect of staying without any support was scary and depressing. In the end I decided to stay for my kids.
In a way, being a single mom was my saving grace. I couldn’t really afford to fall completely apart so I decided to take care of myself. I took a year off relationships to find out who I was, what I liked, didn’t like (Eat, Pray, Love style…without the exotic locations).I needed to figure out why my opinion of myself was so low. Why I felt Like I needed to be in a relationship to have self-worth.
I practiced progressive body relaxation every night with an audio track I found online and I asked for guidance…any kind of guidance. I wasn’t exactly the religious type. You could even say that I had a bit of grudge against “God”. But I was desperate. So every night before going the sleep I would repeat: “please help, thank you, please help, thank you…”
This became a nightly ritual because it helped me sleep better. In my spare time, I watched inspiring videos and read self-help books. I started keeping a gratitude journal and wrote all the little things I was grateful for at the end of every day. I spent time doing simple things I love (taking baths, knitting, spending time with kids), I went to see a shrink a couple of times and slowly my life took a different direction.
Today, I am a different person, I love my life, my relationship with the kids is great and I have faith that everything is unfolding the way it should.
It will get better Kate.
Much love, and don’t hesitate to get hold of me if you feel the need.