Hi Femalemt,

Sorry to hear you are unhappy.
I look at things a bit differently than you, and I strongly believe in measured doses of tough love. So here goes.
I treat Meditation as a tool for invoking the relaxation response…not as a healing tool. Being in the fight or flight state is what is the killer…and leads to stress, anxiety and a truck load of physical ailments. Meditation is a means of “breaking the cycle”, and getting the body back on track….which,in turns, has a positive affect on the mind. However, this is working on the symptoms. healing can only come from working on the root causes. You say:

my thoughts/beliefs about the past still come back to haunt me and feelings of hurt/sadness/depression/blaming/regret surface.

This is closer to where your problem may lie. Your emotions…hurt, sadness, blame and regret…are the barometer of your mental wellbeing. And from reading the above, it appears you’re in the middle of a hurricane.
Until you can review, with a view to changing, the beliefs that are causing these emotions, nothing much will change for you. The goal is to replace limiting beliefs with empowering beliefs…and if your current beliefs are activating those types of emotions, then I suggest they are limiting.
If these emotions are really causing you significant daily stress, I suggest you consider seeking the assistance of a therapist who can take you through the “review process”. It can be a very difficult task by yourself.
I wish you all the best.