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Reply To: Why do we always want what we can't have

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#67813
wood95
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Steve, you’re a thoughtful guy and I hope you receive a positive karmic reward soon. You mentioned cycles of messaging success – don’t look for patterns; it’s all random. From what I’ve learned of relationships, you have to hope for everything and count on nothing. I’m at a low point emotionally, unemployed and facing a lonely winter.
A woman from my church, on whom I had a crush a few years ago, contacted me last week and invited me on a nature hike. We had a great time, and she was flirting with me. Afterward, I helped move some furniture into her house and she hinted that we’d been on a date. I said I didn’t know whether it was or not.
I’m attracted to this one, but my heart is still with the woman from last spring and I can’t stand the thought of playing someone. My friend’s wife told me she’d done some snooping and the object of my desire is a player and a maneater. While some things she did are consistent with that, I don’t think you can reduce people to generic types. I got quite upset and argued to the contrary, and she backed down. I can see that if anything develops with Ms-Last-Spring I’ll be wary of introducing her to my friend’s wife.
I’ve always been able to count on friends shitting on me; if I rejected everyone who did that, I wouldn’t have any friends. Weird. We live in a community where people love to gossip, and my friend’s wife has suffered for that; I know she was looking out for me, so I’m letting it pass.