Hi Jade,
First off, wow you have had to deal with a lot. My hat goes off to you girl!

Secondly he’s being plain disrespectful to you for not just contacting you but telling you about how distraught he is about this girl breaking up with him. You don’t deserves this.

Now to answer your question. In all honesty who knows what he’s trying to do. No one will ever have access to his thoughts or motives except for him and then again maybe he doesn’t know. That’s not the point. The point is about you Jade. From your message it sounds like your confused and justifyingly so about his actions. What does his actions show? He doesn’t respect the 5 year relationship you two had together and he doesn’t respect you enough not to bother you, thinking he can confide in you. Newsflash to your ex boyfriend: the right for him to be allowed to confide in you was severed when he chose to break up with you. You said you are trying to act neutral about this and at one point said you don’t want to be mean. You are not being mean. Putting up boundaries is not mean. Another point you mentioned is how insulted you feel and that he’s making you feel worse. My advice is reread your message focusing on you instead of him. You don’t have to answer his messages. Set boundaries. Don’t worry about coming off nice to him but about being nice to yourself. He doesn’t deserve this special treatment. By you responding to his messages and being neutral and supportive you are saying it’s ok for you to treat me like this. Take this from someone who got her heart broken too. When my ex brok off our three year relationship with me and we later talked about the relationship I tried to appease him by being the understanding ex when he told me I wouldn’t be good enough. I ended up texting him that he should text me when he realizes his mistake and he told me he would text me in a couple of years, pretty much giving him the ok to swing by whenever he pleases.
The point that I’m trying to make is that the exes in our lives Jade don’t deserve us and that by you and me saying it’s ok for them to treat us as dispensible and merely come in when they please and they will be welcomed with open arms says that we need to put boundaries up (not responding or honestly tell them to respect our boundaries and goodbye). If you need to, print out those texts he sent you to show how disrespectful he actted towards you so when he does respond you can be reminded that he doesn’t deserve your response or support. In the mean time, drink martinis, do your favorite aerobic sport, pick up an interesting hobby, hang out with friends and family, and enjoy your life:) I hope this helps and best of luck to you my dear:)