Dear Hotfuzz:
How does the best friend know she never had romantic feelings for you? Did the friend inhabit your hoped for gf’s body and mind? If the friend didn’t want to tell you about the guy so not to hurt your feelings (first post)- why did she tell you that the hoped for gf did never had any romantic feelings for you? I am suspicious about the so called “best friend”‘s motives and validity of knowledge…

Regarding the fact she did not communicate with you more as if you were her best friend… the thing is once you communicated with her your interest in an exclusive relationship, you were no longer in a position in her life where she could communicate with you freely about such things- you were too invested in her to be a convenient sounding board. Your neutrality was gone.

Having made these two points. whta is most important in your last post is you stating that you feel depressed and hopeless because you realize that you really liked her. I figure you are experiencing a sense of loss of that woman in your life. It is a valid feeling, sadness, when you lose something that was of value to you. I hope you accept this feeling as valid, understandable. Seek what you can learn from it about you, about what you need, what you needed in your childhood, maybe, and didn’t get then… Use this time to gently, patiently learn about yourself. Perhaps shift the focus from her motives, her possible … misbehavior to learning more about the real important person in your life: you.

Take care of you:
anita