Dear Carole:

Talking about reflecting back a feeling, YOUR feeling: I read that you are feeling “anxious and overburdened!” with an exclamation mark, by your sister accusing you. I am thinking that it may very well be wiser for you to have no contact with her. Instead of waiting for her to contact you, why not you choosing to not have contact with her? Anxious and overburdened by your interactions with her… this is hurting YOU.

Take care of yourself first. Your sister is accusing you, accusing is a strong verb. I don’t like it, not at all. She refuses to have therapy and you are looking for more therapy, partially to deal with her…? This is not right.

Given your long standing rescuer role with your sister and her lack of willingness to do the work to heal, and her temper tantrums, accusing you, that is setting you deeper into that rescuer role which is harming you. I strongly feel that no contact with her is best for you (and for her).

anita

anita