Dear Jack:

A share: I keep fearing being attacked: as I was anticipating your response to my latest comment, I was afraid, as I often am, afraid you will criticize me negatively for having voiced what is real to me. I often fear people attacking me, here and everywhere else. I hear that voice in my head anticipating an attack.

Not too long ago as I walked (the loop I take daily) I was often afraid, when I heard a car driving behind me, that the driver will run over me, on purpose. Because I was attacked as a child, over and over again, I still fear it.

Similar to the voices you hear, that superego I mentioned before, the toxic internal critic, taking after those who attacked us in one way or another.

No one is on a pedestal for me anymore, what a relief.
anita