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Should I let go?

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  • This topic has 3 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 9 years ago by Anonymous.
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  • #86850
    Ashley
    Participant

    Hello everyone,

    I’ve been an avid reader of TinyBuddha and I must say that I love this site. I suffer from low self esteem, confidence issues, anxiety, and depression so this site has helped me a little. I am going through something right now and it does not feel good at all. I met this guy on POF and he seemed like such a nice guy. We were together for a short time but I felt like he was the one for me and I we really had a connection. We would talk on the phone and text almost everyday and we were really happy but now things have changed. I don’t know why but i’m actually worried that he is either losing interest or is seeing someone else. For the past 2 days we didn’t talk and I assumed that he was with someone else but he had told me that he got into an accident at his job and that he was in the hospital. So when he came home he was blowing my phone up literally with texts and calls but I had turned it off because I was upset. So we got back in contact and he told me how much he loved me and what happened so I felt relieved that he was okay. Now it’s like he’s not talking to me at all. I’m not sure if I could be overreacting or not. I tried texting him but no response and i’m honestly very worried and I think it’s taking a toll on me. What i’m asking is that could I be jumping to conclusions? I care for him a lot and I want for our relationship to work but how can it if he doesn’t talk to me? Should I just give him space? Please help.

    Thanks

    #86870
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Ashley:

    Maybe he lied when he told you before that he had an accident. It is a possibility that he came up with it because it was an easy way to explain why he was gone for the time he was gone from your life and get your empathy at the same time. What will be the reason for him being gone this time? I would wait for his answer as patiently as I can, aware of the possibility above and cautious. This is how you get to know people, sometime getting to know people takes waiting patiently. If he answers you, study his answer, see how it fits with the picture you have. There may be a need for you to … adjust what you see to fit reality. Actually that is always in the making, if you remain awake to and curious about what is really taking place…

    anita

    #88051
    Kate
    Participant

    Dear Ashley,
    Sorry to hear you are experiencing these troubles. I noticed during your post you have been texting and speaking on the phone to this guy. Have you met this person face to face? My initial thoughts when I read your post was that if you haven’t, this is an awful lot of hassle and negative emotions to spend on somebody whom you haven’t had social interaction with. This could be a huge risk. You deserve to be happy and have the company of someone who worships the ground you walk on. Don’t settle, for anyone to give you attention. Perhaps suggest meeting with this guy? Then you will know his true intentions and whether he is prepared to make an effort making your relationship work.

    Kate x

    #88091
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Kate:

    As to your statement above: “You deserve to be happy and have the company of someone who worships the ground you walk on.”

    I don’t deserve to have anyone worship me, bad, bad idea! Bad idea to worship anyone. You will save yourself a lot of trouble, Kate, if you no longer expect someone out there to worship you and if you, god forbid, worship someone else.

    The fall from worshiping someone else or from being worshiped is a nasty, nasty, bruising fall.

    Love gradually, keeping your eyes open, do not worship.

    anita

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