well sorry if you need alcohol to relax then you have a problem!

You’ve just eliminated a lot people right there, male and female.
Ok, how many times does he do it? Weekly then I agree, it would be disrespectful to wife and kids.
Once a year? No that is fine in my opinion. Even every 6 months.
Seems like there are other issues in the relationship besides his drinking/nights out until 3.00am. Better to address the relationship as a whole. Lack of trust perhaps?
If my wife nagged me too much, I might start doing the same. Except for the cost to body and hip-pocket.
Junaita aka Jack