Dear Nan:

I read your last post and re-read your original post. What an amazing story you have!

My comment regarding what you wrote, that you did not have a “bad relationship” with your paternal grandmother who acted as your mother, only a guilt ridden one. A guilt ridden relationship is a bad relationship and one that proves very harmful to you. A relationship that significantly harms you and for so long… was and is a bad relationship.

I too watched The Bridges of Madison County many times. I own the DVD and love that movie. At the scene when she is riding in her husband’s truck, following Eastwood’s car, when she is considering opening the door, I wanted to scream to her: go, go, go to him!!! How can one not identify with going after the person you love, when that person really loves you, choosing your own happiness.

The fact that you do not have minor children and none living with you is very significant to me in this context of your thread.

Is it my understanding that what was with your husband all those years was motivated by your guilt, wanting to please him… that there was no real love there… and that there is no real love there?

anita