Dear Seekingwisdom:

I am glad you posted here. First, the obvious: any and every disagreement between you and your ex husband, including disagreements about what is best for your ill daughter, hurts her, increases her anxiety and stops her from healing.

She must be protected from the animosity between you and your ex husband.

Then, of course, your own anxiety, as understandable as it is, harms her too. She needs as calm an environment as possible and that must be number one priority in her treatment, as well as in promoting your own well being and that of your other daughter.

Anxiety, ongoing excess fear, is a cause of a lot, lots and lots of symptoms. Even if there is another cause, anxiety will add to the severity of the symptoms and produce new symptoms in addition to the symptoms of lets say a viral infection.

Can you think of ways your ill daughter is witnessing distress between you and her father that can be eliminated? Ways to make her home environment as calm as possible? I am sure you thought about these things, but thinking more.. ??

anita