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A Life-Changing Guide for Emotionally Sensitive People (and a Giveaway!)

Sad Girl Illustration

Update: The winners for this giveaway have been chosen:

You’re too sensitive. You’re making a big deal out of nothing. Why are you letting that bother you? Why can’t you just let it go? Really, you’re crying? What’s wrong with you? 

If you’re an emotionally sensitive person, like me, you may have heard some of these phrases throughout your life. And, like me, you may have concluded that your emotions made you tragically flawed.

For the longest time, I felt a deep sense of shame about my sensitivity. And I found it difficult to deal with everyday life—not just because I felt everything so deeply and often reacted irrationally, but also because I absorbed other people’s feelings as if they were my own.

I remember in elementary school when most of my peers had to get shots from the school nurse. I’d already gotten one at my pediatrician’s office, so I sat in the hallway as, one by one, they approached her office to meet certain doom.

I could recall the fear and dread I'd felt in the moments before the needle pierced my skin, and I relived it, over and over again, as each student approached the door. In fact, my vicarious anxiety was so intense that I threw up, right there in the hallway.

I didn’t just empathize with their pain—I felt it. Deeply. And repeatedly.

I constantly felt emotionally overwhelmed, and often confused about the root of my feelings. All I knew was that I hurt—a lot—and I wanted to make it stop.

When I first realized I wasn’t alone with my emotional sensitivity, it was like someone rubbed a soothing balm on the achy heart I wore on my sleeve.

And it was even more liberating to realize I could leverage my sensitivity for good, as I have through Tiny Buddha.

Suddenly, it wasn’t something I had to hide; it was something I could openly acknowledge and harness in a positive way.

Still, I’ve had to work at managing my emotions, and I’ve had to learn to challenge destructive thoughts and behaviors that only exacerbate my pain.

If you too experience intense emotions, you don’t need to feel bad about yourself, or powerless to your heightened sensitivity.

Psychologist Karyn D. Hall has written a life-changing book that can help you manage your emotions so they don’t take over your life.

The Emotionally Sensitive Person: Finding Peace When Your Emotions Overwhelm You offers proven strategies to identify emotional triggers, challenge negative thought patterns, and recover from emotions more quickly.

I wish I’d read this book years ago. It’s insightful, practical, and chock-full of effective strategies to transform your sensitivity from a burden to a gift.

I’m grateful that Karyn took the time to provide some incredibly detailed answers to my questions about emotional sensitivity, and that she’s provided two free copies of The Emotionally Sensitive Person for Tiny Buddha readers.

Sensitive CoverThe Giveaway

To enter to win one of two free copies of The Emotionally Sensitive Person:

  • Leave a comment below
  • For an extra entry, tweet: Enter the @tinybuddha giveaway to win a copy of The Emotionally Sensitive Person http://bit.ly/1KZGNnL

You can enter until midnight PST on Friday, May 22nd.

The Interview

1. Tell us a little bit about yourself and what inspired you to write this book.

I’m a therapist who works with emotionally sensitive people and I’m an emotionally sensitive person too.

I noticed that many people were suffering because they felt different, rejected, and flawed because of their emotional sensitivity. Many of them had heard statements like, “You’re just overreacting,” and “Stop being so dramatic,” for most of their lives.

In my work I found that if emotionally sensitive people could understand and accept their sensitivity, and not judge themselves because of it, that could ease some of the suffering they experience. I also believe that learning to manage intense emotions is part of decreasing their suffering.

Being emotionally sensitive is not an illness, but it does mean you are more vulnerable to anxiety and depression and other disorders. Judging and hating yourself for being sensitive is part of the pain and suffering that happens.

I wanted to write a book that could help emotionally sensitive people accept their sensitivity and learn to manage their intense emotions to help them live the life they want to live.

2. What causes emotional sensitivity?

Emotional sensitivity is biological. Research shows that some individuals are born with more intense emotions, meaning you react faster to emotional situations, your emotions are more intense, and your emotions take longer to fade. Events in a person’s life could also influence that emotional sensitivity.

3. Emotionally sensitive people, like myself, often feel shame for being this way. What can help people like me feel less ashamed, more accepting, and perhaps even proud of their emotional sensitivity?

First of all, ask yourself if the shame you experience is based on facts. All emotions have a purpose, and the role of shame is to keep you from behaving in ways that would get you kicked out of groups that are critical to your survival.

Most likely being an emotionally sensitive adult will not get you kicked out of important groups. Is the shame from being judged by others as flawed? Perhaps as a child? Maybe from people who didn’t understand? Perhaps give some thought as to what specifically the shame is about and how it came to be.

So if shame is not justified, that being emotionally sensitive is not something that warrants shame, then consider that the way to overcome shame is to do the opposite behavior to that which shame urges you to do.

Shame urges you to hide. So the opposite behavior is to not hide. To do the opposite is to look people in the eye, and stand up proud of your sensitivity. When people say, “You’re overreacting,” respond with pride, “Actually, this is exactly how I feel—I feel emotions intensely.”

Many times it is the discomfort that other people have with emotions that leads them to criticize your emotional reactions.

Our culture tends to value logical, analytical thinking. That doesn’t make their way better. In fact, emotionally sensitive people are the ones who become passionate about causes and make changes in the world. They are artists and caregivers and those who contribute to humanity.

The positives of being emotionally sensitive are often overlooked. If you consider it very carefully, what could or are you proud of about your emotional sensitivity? Make a list and review it often. Keep the positives in your mind to help you keep a balanced view of your emotional sensitivity.

Let yourself really see what your sensitivity is about—check out reality and let go of myths you might have accepted along the way about the “wrongness” of emotional sensitivity. Do you care intensely about others? Do you express yourself authentically?

Another idea is to practice self-compassion in place of judging yourself. Respond to yourself as you would a friend who feels emotions strongly.

If your emotional sensitivity leads to depression or anxiety or to behaviors that you know are not effective or helpful, then focus on changing the behaviors and learning ways to manage your emotional sensitivity that work for you rather than judging your sensitivity.

It’s not wrong, it’s just different. Judging your sensitivity is like judging yourself for how short or tall you are. It just is. It’s not helpful to continually berate yourself for your height, and in the same way seeing your sensitivity as wrong or yourself as flawed only adds to your distress and suffering.

4. What are the two different types of emotional sensitivity, and how do they manifest?

The two types I’ve identified are reactive and avoidant. People who are reactive act on feelings without thinking and are very quick to respond to emotional triggers. They have strong impulses that come with their emotions. They can be spontaneous and fun and also may act in ways that cause difficulties for themselves.

The avoidant type attempts to push away or avoid uncomfortable emotions and/or situations. The avoidant type might not attend gatherings if someone at the event was upset with her and would avoid other situations that might involve difficult feelings, such as confronting someone who owed her money or saying no to someone who asked for a favor.

5. What are some things we can do to improve our ability to manage our emotions?

There are many options to improve your ability to manage your emotions. One area is prevention.

This means that you make sure that you get sufficient sleep, eat a nutritious diet, take prescribed medications, take care of your physical health, exercise, and create positive experiences to build your resiliency. Work to develop safe and emotionally intimate relationships so you have a support network.

Let go of judging, stop avoiding your emotions, learn ways to change your emotions, and stop feeding or building difficult emotions. The book discusses the specifics of these ideas. In addition, I have a subscription website opening soon called DBTCoaching.com that focuses on coping skills.

6. You wrote that emotionally sensitive people tend to “catch” other people’s emotions. Can you tell us a little about this, and how we can stop doing it?

Emotionally sensitive people are often tuned in to the emotional experiences of other people, so much so that they may experience the emotion that someone else is having. If you are with someone who is sad, you may feel sadness too, for example.

Awareness that you are experiencing an emotion that actually belongs to someone else is helpful in letting go of it.

If someone is relating an experience that made them sad, then you can say to yourself, “Not my experience, her experience,” to help maintain the boundary.

If you experience emotions that you imagine others might have, such as “She must be so sad,” then remind yourself that someone else’s experience is not necessarily the same as yours. For example, if someone is moving, he might be excited and happy instead of sad or scared or vice versa.

7. In reading the “Identifying Your Emotions” section of the book, I realized I’ve mislabeled many thoughts as feelings, compromising my ability to cope with my actual emotions effectively. Can you share a few examples of mislabeling thoughts as feelings, and how we can identify what we really feel?

Some examples of mislabeling thoughts as feelings can be as simple as, “I feel like I’ll never succeed,” “I feel like I don’t fit in anywhere,” and “I feel like I’m different from anyone else.”

Those expressions are actually thoughts. To be more accurate your would say, “I think I don’t fit in anywhere and that makes me sad,” and “I think I’m different from anyone else and that makes me sad.” Then you either challenge the thoughts or find ways to cope with the feelings that come with the thought.

It’s difficult to challenge statements when you express them as feelings. “I am scared because I think I’ll never succeed” gives you the information about both the feeling you are having and the thought.

You recognize that as a negative thought and you can challenge it. Is that statement true? In what situation do you think it is true? Do the facts back it up? If so, what do you need to do differently? The emotion of sadness would indicate coping skills to help you deal with that specific emotion.

8. In Chapter 6, you wrote, “Judgments hide primary feelings.” What did you mean by this—and how can we challenge our judgments?

We often judge when we are emotionally upset. “He is a complete jerk,” is a judgment. What led to that thought and emotion? Maybe you were embarrassed because you spilled wine all over yourself and your date didn’t offer to help clean up. You use the judgment of him to cover the embarrassment.

“I spilled wine all over myself and I felt hurt that he didn’t help me clean it up,” might be more accurate.

9. The chapter that was most helpful to me personally was the one on decision-making—particularly the part about separating the decision from the emotion and accepting emotional consequences. Can you expand on this?

I’ve found that many emotionally sensitive people believe they can’t make decisions but they actually avoid decisions because of the emotional consequences of those decisions.

There are few choices that don’t have emotional consequences. Even picking a restaurant for a group dinner means someone will likely not agree with the choice and may be disappointed or critical. You know which restaurant you want, but you struggle with the decision because of the emotional consequences of the decision. You don’t want anyone upset.

If you can separate the two, the choice of restaurant and the emotional consequences of the choice, then you can be clear about what the issue is and how you want to manage it.

10. What do you think is the most important thing an emotionally sensitive person can do for their well-being?

Accept themselves as they are, completely and totally, and also work on changing behaviors that are keeping them from being effective in building the life they want to live.

You can find The Emotionally Sensitive Person on Amazon here.

FTC Disclosure: I receive complimentary books for reviews and interviews on tinybuddha.com, but I am not compensated for writing or obligated to write anything specific. I am an Amazon affiliate, meaning I earn a percentage of all books purchased through the links I provide on this site. 

Girl under rain clouds image via Shutterstock

About Lori Deschene

Lori Deschene is the founder of Tiny Buddha and Recreate Your Life Story, an online course that helps you let go of the past and live a life you love. Her latest bookTiny Buddha's Gratitude Journal, which includes 15 coloring pages, is now available for purchase. For daily wisdom, follow Tiny Buddha on Twitter, Facebook & Instagram..

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  • Sandra Pawula

    I’m a sensitive person too! I’m so sorry you had to go through so much pain when kids got their shots at your school, Lori. There is so much in this interview that spoke to me. I know I have trouble with decisions, in particular. I often can’t decide what to do so it’s encouraging to understand that this is just part of who I am and I can learn to work with it. Thank you, Karyn.

  • suzeeeeq22

    Cool Book, always open to support when life overwhelms!!

  • flybrarian

    A coworker has told me on several occasions that I am to effected by the emotions of those around me and has told me it isn’t healthy to take all that on. I’ve found that really annoying because I think to be empathic and emotionally sensitive can be a good thing if done in an intelligent way. I’m looking forward to reading more about this.

  • zettt

    Thanks for the blog. Love your writing. Would love to get this book too.

  • Tiffany Cuthbertson

    Wow. Just reading this blog, I relate completely! I thought maybe I was alone and doomed in life. Thank you So Much for sharing. Even if I don’t win A copy of this book, im grateful for have reading this interview. It has seriously given more hope than you know.

  • Salma Samy

    This “For the longest time, I felt a deep sense of shame about my sensitivity.” and this, “Emotionally sensitive people are often tuned in to the emotional experiences of other people, so much so that they may experience the emotion that someone else is having.” so true..

  • Hazel Jenkins

    Tiny buddah seems to be one of the only places where i feel i can relate to people. Ive always presumed there was something wrong with me for being so nervous and scared and emotional all the time. I have forever been told how i ‘shouldnt let things bother me so much’, but how is that even possible? Its who i am… I love reading tiny buddah, especially when i am feeling doubtful of myself. I discovered it only last year and can safely say i am a much happier person one year on. Im still on a journey, and i hope i can continue it with tinybuddah. Thank you Lori!

  • Bridget Howe

    I definitely want to put my name in for this giveaway! This article resonated so much with me so I can only imagine what the book would speak to me. I am an emotionally sensitive person and I’ve always felt shame for it. I recently went through a break up and my partner admitted that they couldn’t handle my emotional reactions to being hurt or sad, which in turn made me feel unlovable or broken. It’s a relief to know I dont struggle alone and that it doesn’t make me “wrong” or too much. I feel things deeply and reflecting back, my empathy and ability to fully feel my emotions seemed to challenge my partners emotional barriers. Regardles, I’d love to read more about this!

  • Beautiful! Thank you for sharing this xxx

  • thorayya SG

    A great read (but then so is most of the posts on tiny Buddha!)…so often people assume there is one right way to be and we all have to fit within it. As someone who often does not fit within this “right way,” I have spent time struggling with the aspects of me that make me who I am. I appreciate the time spent on this topic – thank you. Would love to see this book 🙂

  • Kathy Erickson

    This sounds like the perfect read for me. I am definitely an “avoidant” type and will do most anything to run into a situation or person that has caused me pain. The interview was very interesting and I’d love to read more! Thanks so much.

  • Laura

    I just started making it a mission to read TinyBuddha daily. Every post is so inspirational. It’s nice to read other’s experiences and wisdom as they go through their own journeys. I’ve been overly critical to myself about my heightened level of sensitivity soooooo many times. This book sounds like an excellent tool and I’d love to check it out!

  • raychil

    Sounds like an awesum book! Please enter me into the comp 🙂

  • Wow Lori this is completely new to me, but explains so much…I can see my mom as reactive and me as avoidant for most of my life…this is on my must read list soon…would love to win a copy but will read it one way or another…thanks for bringing this subject to us….

  • Stef

    I think I am a sensitive person and take on other’s stress or depression and would love to stop. My son is extremely sensitive and I would love to know ways to help him with this. He is 12 and it is a balancing act for sure. Would love to give him some skills to carry with him throughout his life.

  • Kellie

    I was just discussing this exact thing with my Fiance this weekend. I am so highly emotional that I have such a hard time letting go. I even get angry when we start to talk about attachment just because it seems so easy to “just let go” but it is the hardest thing for me to comprehend. Urg. I feel our son will be the same way because he is so empathetic. Only time will tell. Thank you for the article.

  • MutableParadox

    I would love this. I am definitely an avoidant type.

  • Kelly Hunsberger

    I would love this. I am definitely an avoidant type.

  • Harlene Haro

    Definitely have always had a problem with this issue in romantic relationships…would love to be stronger and more emotionally intelligent

  • Tscott Volz

    I recall being deeply sensitive as child and how much trouble it caused in my relationships. Now my daughter is experiencing the same thing. I pray for her to realize her strength and find peace.

  • Jordan

    Interesting, I am defiantly the avoidance type. When I was younger I would avoid saying ‘hi’ to people and avoid certain gatherings if things weren’t just right. It is great that people are more honest about these things now, and it is nice to know that people like me aren’t simply an outlier.

  • Paige

    I actually seem to have both avoidant and reactive patterns. I can spend countless hours worrying about my reactions feeling anxious and not wanting to leave the house. I hate that my sensitivity is not under control. I recently read how we compensate to try to appear like everyone else. Very interesting

  • Jeff

    Wow– how many times have I heard in my life that I’m over-sensitive to things? How often have I considered myself as some kind of broken person because I experience emotions? I see it in my son, too. I’ll be getting and reading this book one way or another.

  • Mugure K. Crawford

    I definitely wear my heart on my sleeve being a sensitive passionate person.
    Thank you for providing such insight on how to deal with issues in new ways.

  • Mandy Griffiths

    I’m over sensitive to the fact that I’m over sensitive! I’m grumpy and defensive before people have even spoken to me. I expect hassle, I expect name calling and criticism. So I stay home more or avoid people where I can.

  • Elle

    This sounds like an incredibly helpful book. Even that short interview was illuminating.

  • Brandie Stapley

    Until I read this I honestly thought I had a mental sickness because I could feel others pain. I would be tortured day by day with everyone’s pain, along with my own. Thank you for opening my eyes and providing tools to turn this into a positive!

  • I just learned about Highly Sensitive People a couple of years ago and am still navigating my way through this: I’d love this book!

  • Paula Wexler

    This book would be such a great thing for me to read! I would truly appreciate winning this!!

  • Char

    Wow. Thank you so much for reminding me I’m not unique or broken. I am definitely hoping to win this book, but if I do not, I will buy it for myself. This exact characteristic has cost me almost every friendship I have ever had.

  • motherlovin3

    Good read. I think it’s interesting to read the comments, especially those who are highly sensitive and have children who are also. My children and I are highly sensitive people.

  • Lindsy Fish

    This would be really helpful to me!

  • Jessica N

    This book would not only be helpful for myself but better working with my patients!

  • Sam

    I have BPD and struggle with emotions. I’ve always balled my eyes out when I’m happy for someone. I cry when I’m overwhelmed by any emotion really. This book sounds really interesting 🙂

  • Red Raven

    My sensitivity was put down by many people growing up. It took a while, but I eventually came to see it as a gift. I worked on having better boundaries and being assertive and that helped a lot. I love being sensitive now, but I do not let people walk all over me, nor do I “absorb” or take on the feelings of others. I also seem to attract many sensitive friends as well.

  • Melissa

    I too am deeply sensitive. Growing up, I had a very hard time managing my emotions. I often let little things bother me and still do frequently. I am also such a worrier! It’s really eye opening to read this and understand that there are others out there who feel the same. I have been working on going with the flow and not sweating the small stuff. This article was very helpful. Thank you.

  • Kiki Howell

    I would love to read this book 🙂

  • I’d love to win the book….lord knows I need all the help I can get with my emotions and sensitivities!

  • Nancy Kunz Paredes

    So happy it’s not just me! Sometimes other people’s pain overwhelms me.

  • timandtori2

    I could really use this book!! I’ve ALWAYS been a bit “sensitive” and caught flack for it ALL my life…matter of fact I’m pretty sick of catching flack for it..I am who I am.

  • Christina

    Sounds like an amazing book – I only learned of this term recently, but everything I have learned has given me a better understanding of my own reactions to things.

  • Amy Burns Williams

    Avoidance doesn’t work. It’s important to learn how to manage this quality in oneself.

  • Arijana Dojcinov

    Being a sensitive person seems like a curse, but it’s a blessing in disguise-we do feel more than the most, but our lives are therefore more intense and colorful. We can fall in the abyss of pain and depression, but we can also experience the heights of love, compassion and bliss others can only read about in novels. I wouldn’t want to be any other way.

  • Bronwyn Weekes

    Brilliant article. I draw great comfort from the saying ” It is both a blessing and a curse to feel so deeply”.

  • Kiki Empey

    Slowly teaching my husband about my sensitivity, I love to show him things like this for when I can’t explain why I’m this way.

  • Marla Rae Morrison

    Wow! I totally need this book in my life!

  • Matt

    I’ve been looking for a book like this!

  • Diana C

    I would love this book. I am a counselor and could use it for my clients. Thanks!

  • LLyons

    My late stepmother always said I was highly sensitive and I thought she was wrong. But I realize that deep feelings I have are suppressed and then when they do surface, they’re more intense. I now cry at everything, and it’s affecting my ability to move.forward. I hope.this.book will help me to.convert overwhelming emotions into empathetic action.

  • Kevin

    Very interesting! Here’s my entry!

  • Hans Schmidt

    “Emotional sensitivity is biological.” Really? Always? What about the impact of early life trauma on people and their ability to handle overwhelming emotions? And what would explain a person within a family who is emotionally sensitive but is surrounded by family members who are not only emotionally insensitive, but who are emotionally abusive toward the emotionally sensitive one?

  • Gavin Birnam

    I look forward to reviewing this with my wife. Much of what you describe has been her lived experience!

  • Lynds

    My mum and I are are so alike, except she is so sensitive and I am not at all. I would like to read the book so I can understand her and she may wish to read it too.

  • Anandamayi

    Thank you for writing this book. It so speaks to what it’s like to have this blessing/curse of being sensitive.

  • Becky LoveKing

    This book looks great!

  • Trudy Buwalda

    I could really use this book right now…

  • Jaime Nickerson

    I’ve always been known as “The Cryer”; one of my many stories I have tried to rewrite over the years. Looking forward to having a read of this book!

  • Jewelly

    Thank you for sharing this post (and for this website). I visit often for insightful support.

  • Faith Spivey

    My husband and I were just discussing this last night.

  • RS

    I would like to say I think this book could help so many people!! I would like the opportunity to win a copy. Thank you

  • Karen

    Would love to read this book!

  • Valerie

    I would love to read this book.

  • Katherine

    Very interesting article. Very much what I needed to read today.

  • Karla

    I can completely relate. Until reading articles like these it’s so easy to feel ashamed and put ourselves down. This book seems like a great resource. I would love to read it.

  • Karen Clark Ellis

    So . . . I’m not the only one?? 🙂 Good to know . . . looking forward to reading this book . . .:)

  • Shannon Alexander

    Thank you for sharing the title of this book Lori!

    I have always been a very sensitive person. Recently, I had a pretty painful breakup that left me reeling. It has been difficult of course (and I think especially because I feel my emotions so strongly), but it has also been quite positive, in that I have committed to really discovering who I am.

    In this quest to better understand myself and my emotions, I read this book called “Emotional Awareness.” It was a compilation of discussions between the Dalai Lama and pyschologist Paul Ekman. As the title suggests, their discussions center on emotional awareness. After reading the book I have been seeking concrete tools to develop this awareness. I believe that THIS book would be a perfect place to begin!

  • Cathy Burbules Sexton

    It has taken me a long time to come to terms with my sensitivity. I used to get so overwhelmed that all I could do was react, not respond. I was a big pouter and cryer when I was little and I still cry with too much stimulus around me. But now, at 50, I’ve learned that my sensitivity is a gift and it has a purpose. I’m still trying to manage letting go of the feelings with the hopes of not being so overtaken by them. Perhaps the book can help with that?

  • Amy Moore

    I would love the opportunity to win this book. I’m glad someone has addresses this topic because there are a lot of us. I would love to read this book not only for myself, but to help me in parenting my sensitive five year old (she already exhibits so many of these emotions).

  • Paula G.

    I have always been an incredibly sensitive person. Soaking up other peoples emotions, pain, fear and drama like a sponge. My tears are my friend and I find solace in crying. I try to thicken my skin and lessen my sensitivity by always trying to RESPOND not REACT.

  • Penny Brown Conlan

    It has been a growing realization but really began to ‘get it’ in my 30’s. Use various techniques to protect myself at different time, especially when in crowds of people but the occasional comments from individuals close to me can pierce me like a knife. Good to know about a book addressing the issue.

  • Michele

    I can totally relate. Always been referred to as too sensitive and a “cryer.” Can’t wait to read this book.

  • Peace Within

    Sounds like an amazing book! When we accept the fact that we are sensitive people, it actually turns into a blessing! =)

  • Amalia

    I can definitely relate to this one! I’ve had to work on this over the years and have always felt a strong reaction to things which led to feeling depressed a lot. I wish I would have had something like this when I was younger so I didn’t feel so isolated, but I’m so glad it’s a source now for those that feel similar.

  • Elizabeth O.

    I’d be interested in reading this. I feel I’m on the cusp of being an emotionally sensitive person. Was way too sensitive as a child, that’s for sure, and it made life hard.

  • Jess

    I love this! I have been told I have Social Anxiety, but I’m an incredibly sensitive person as well. I often share in other’s feelings, as you spoke of here. I’ve been in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for two years now and it has helped a lot. Many of the suggestions here are something I would be told in therapy to practice. However, my counselor often asks why I might cry about, for instance, a child that I saw meeting with a social worker. What happened to me that would trigger such an emotion. Often times, i don’t know. It’s just that I’m sensitive. I will be reading this book! Thank you so much for sharing!

  • Carla DiCandia

    Thank you so much for sharing your experiences… I’ve suffered for YEARS with “over-sensitivity” and it is refreshing to see that there are other people like me. It’s painful and really leads to compassion fatigue, and eventually feelings of being victimized, albeit by our own hand. Thank you so much for sharing. Can’t wait to read the book!

  • Jilly Bean Green

    I’m grateful for the increased awareness & understanding of highly sensitive/emotionally sensitive people. I have wished for years I could somehow numb my heightened emotions. Now, I’m learning to embrace them & view them as a gift…it’s so liberating!

  • Jordana

    As someone who has often been referred to as a “Superfeeler”, I found this post to be exceptionally comforting. It’s a relief to know that I am not alone in my struggle to handle intense emotions and remind myself that feeling emotions deeply is not always a bad thing, if we learn how to manage them.

  • Louise Pedersen

    I’ve been really sensitive for as long as I can remember. Like when I was a kid and my dad told me off for something and when I’d cry he’d get more annoyed with me….
    A few months ago my brother told me he’s getting married to his girlfriend and I was so so happy I teared up and cried. Trying to explain to my 3 year old nephew that aunt Louise cries when she’s happy, sad, upset, angry or extatic was difficult.
    My nephew has the same lovely sensitive heart and I’m sure both his parents and I could benefit from reading that amazing book 🙂

  • Mallory Carpenter

    This sounds awesome! Would love to read it. 🙂

  • arrith

    This sounds like something I need to read. Especially since I am getting ready to enter the workforce as human services professional that is also an emotionally sensitive person. In my internships I have already seen how this can sometimes cause a conflict between myself, what I am feeling, and workplace policies.

  • Kendra

    Looks like an interesting book.

  • Manolah

    knowing that I am an emotionally sensitive person – not that something is “wrong” with me – has been so beneficial. I’ve learned coping techniques, better self-care, and I’ve learned not to apologize for just being me. Thanks for this.

  • Sarah

    Thank you for this wonderful interview! I have always been a very sensitive person. I am very empathetic as well, so that is someone else is feeling sensitive, I can pick up on this too. I am much less sensitive than I was when I was younger. As a grandmother of two college grad boys, I have learned to distance myself from my sensitive feelings and ask myself, “am I feeling this way because of the situation or because of my own insecurities about the situation”. I look forward to reading more from Karyn Hall to garner more helpful insights!

  • Tricia Sabol

    This book sounds absolutely wonderful, and as a sensitive person, I would love to have a copy of it!

  • Jem*Star

    In today’s world, most people think that sensitive persons such as myself are weak for having such strong feelings & look down on us making it that much harder to honor our true selves… I hope I win this book because I could really use it right now

  • Jody Staudt

    i am all too familiar with this way of “being”..love all the insight…really helps in understanding why i am who i am and why i do what i do..thank you for this piece!!

  • Maureen Asten

    Great book the world would be better off if everyone was a highly sensitive person. Like perhaps we would be kinder to mother nature and live healthier lives and no destruction and violence

  • Hildegard

    I couldn’t have come cross this at a more desperate time .
    I have always known that I am sensitive but the language people used with my sensitivity had me believing that it was a bad thing and that there was something wrong with me for being so sensitive.
    Reading this has calmed so much of the panic , shame and feeling like there was something terribly wrong with me , and understanding that it is biological , just like having bushy hair makes it so much easier to understand.
    I feel like now I finally know where to start doing my research and digging to better understand myself.
    And I am sure that being true to myself and learning to find healthy ways to deal with my intense emotions will help me feel more at peace with myself and life in general.

  • Shannon

    As long as I can remember, I have been able to walk in a room and take it’s “emotioinal temperature”: then I seem to want to emphathize or fix what’s not humming along well. A huge amount of work, emotionally and physically. Book looks right up my alley.

  • Paola María

    Wow! It’s really awesome to know that there’s actually other people who feel so deeply too! It’s definitely a blessing.

  • Kathy Wallace

    I have always been told I am too sensitive and I just have never seen it that way so I tend to avoid people because it makes me feel so uncomfortable. I would love to read this book and get some new ideas on this.

  • aylin

    Thanks for the really good article, i thought i m the only survivour of the Sensitive people generation. But it seems there are still peole like me. Thanks for the sharing.

  • Natalie Talbert

    This is a great article. I’ve always been a little too sensitive starting at a pretty young age. I love this and how everyone is so open to share their experiences. Thank you.

  • Amazing article. Thank you.

  • Sand

    I think I would find this book to be very helpful.

  • Leslie

    I am so excited about this book. The “highly sensitive person” book made me feel worse, but reading this post made me realize that emotionally sensitive sounds more accurate. Thank you!

  • Hannahmation

    This explains a lot! Glad I’m not alone in feeling so deeply. Sounds like a really great book.

  • Michelle

    Great article – thank you for posting and the insightful questions. Looking forward to reading it!

  • How lovely. What a great article.
    It was so empowering for me to learn that I’m not crazy, just highly sensitive. And that actually, being sensitive offers many gifts once you understand and allow yourself to be grounded in who you really are (i.e. self-acceptance). These days, almost 100% of my clients are also highly sensitive people and I feel like the time is right to help educate people about how to be sensitive and live in this world, without having to shut your sensitivity down – which ultimately has an impact on our wellbeing.
    I’ve tweeted this article and posted it to my Facebook page, too. 🙂

  • Cindy Anderson

    I need to read this book. Always overly sensitive, since becoming disabled it has gotten worse. Thank you for writing this book Dr. Hall. I look forward to finding out what it has to offer to me.

  • Daisy Chick

    I’m only just (at the age of 52) begining to realise that although being a HSP is often very difficult, it can also be a wonderful thing! I think its a shame that more non HSP’s arent aware of this. Its broken my heart many times when Ive been rejected by someone because i’m a HSP but now I’m learning that these people are unaware of the huge loss they are actually creating for themselves and I feel sympathy for them.

  • jayshree

    Can totally relate to this article….always felt i was over emotional, would cry or be upset or burst out with the smallest or biggest triggers from family or friends……..was a bundle of nerves for a long time……..just recently started to realize it was affecting my health, peace of mind, sleep and everything seemed detrimental to my well being….people labelled me and so did I end up labeling myself……always prayed to God, please change me, I cant go on like this crying all the time at the disturbing comments or situations……..and would often question, God why are you not changing me……..thanks for this eyeopener……feels like I am not abnormal after all……Lori, thank you for Tiny Buddha…..surely makes me feel sometimes, life is not so bad after all……..God bless you and all the team and the writers..

  • Heidi Moorcraft

    I have recently been diagnosed with emotional intensity and would so benefit from this book. I do hope that I am one of the lucky winners

  • Tanya

    Everyday is an emotional battle for sensitive people, I find we are most vulnerable in the morning’s and when something is said in a harsh tone or words, its like a sting to the heart. At work a bad comment or harsh tone towards me could emotionally impact me until the very end of my shift and/or until the next day! Its exhausting. I always just classified myself as an overly anxious person, but i have realized that my high emotional awareness plays a huge role in my anxiety. I would LOVE the chance to get a better understanding of being an emotionally sensitive person and find some peace through reading this book. I <3 <3 <3 tinybuddha.

  • Jodie Maree

    Just like the Jewel song says ‘…I’m sensitive and I’d like to stay that way…’ 🙂

  • Catherine Ferguson

    I have always been a very sensitive person. I am now 62 years old and continue to ride up and down on everybody’s emotional roller coasters. It is not only exhausting, but it has robbed me of the joy of many, many moments throughout my life. This book looks like it might contain some concrete information to help me learn to control this issue. Oddly enough, I have seen many psychologists, on and off, over the years. A few have actually told me I am an empath, yet never offered any help so that I could get a handle on this issue. When someone else’s pain affects you physically…it leaves you longing for the nearest escape route, or trying all measure of things to make the other person feel better so you in turn can feel better too. Somewhere along this journey, other people’s pain started triggering anxiety attacks for me too. What if I can’t help them, can’t make them feel better, etc.,etc. The point is, Yes please, show me how to get off the ride, I am willing to learn!

  • I’m going to read this book!! I often am very down when people I’m close to are in pain and my husband often asks ‘but why does that upset you so much?’…

  • Joyce Wong

    It had been a crazy journey before this whenever I felt other people’s pain. This book will certainly help me to manage my emotions way better than before, and thankfully I realise now that having an emotional sensitivity isn’t just because I was so different from the rest, but because, there are people who can be that sensitive and it is a gift and nothing is wrong with us.

  • Helen Fitzpatrick Mcdonald

    Thank you, what a great article. I have often judged myself harshly due to my sensitivity, and because I struggle so much because of it. I’d really like to learn strategies to manage it and to move towards self-acceptance.

  • Prakash (Tiger Advt)

    Sounds really interesting. Can’t wait to read this book.

  • Sheila Judge

    Being High Sensitive is a life learning journey. It is a challenge to channel it while protecting yourself and not let yourself be overwhelmed. Its so positive to see books like this being written, to help more people including myself see it as a gift.

  • Krystal H

    I simply HAVE to read this book. You article was an uncanny description of me.

  • Jen Standish

    It’s nice to know I am not alone in this. My empathy and sympathy know no bounds! Cannot wait to read this book for tips on how to cope.

  • Adam

    Certainly could have used this book when I was younger. Proud to say that I have mastered my emotions.

  • Nati Pyra

    Thank you from the bottom of my heart for this post. I have not only labeled myself, but been labeled by so many throughout my life by family, friends…etc. (psychologist/therapists alike…usually with the clause: inconclusive diagnosis attached to it). This illuminates the simple truth about the simple fact that we are all born different. This has been my gift and my curse, but I see how I can delve deeper into learning more strategies and coping skills. I would love to obtain a copy of this book by Karyn and am absolutely thrilled that DBT will be offered online (I have looked for this for a couple of years, and I’m hoping it will be free of charge, because it’s extremely expensive otherwise). Again, thank you Lori and Karyn. I will read the book regardless, but I do hope to win! Have wonderful day:)

  • Robert Fratini

    I agree with so many others who felt they were alone in dealing with this. I remember a sci-fi movie (but not the title) where Forrest Whittaker played a character who could feel what others were feeling and referred to himself as an “Empathizer,” and really suffered because of this. I’m looking forward to reading this book!

  • Melinda Balasa

    Being emotionally sensitive is something that few people in my world understand. I hear “Why do you take this so personally?” a LOT! Well, the answer is “because I am a person!” I have worked hard to manage my emotions, but with little success until the damage is done and it is time to repair. I would really like to learn new ways of coping, so I hope I win a copy of The Emotionally Sensitive Person book to provide guidance.

  • Jody

    This is so very intriguing. I’ve always been very empathetic, but was brought up to believe that displays of emotion are vulgar (common). My outward stoicism was such that a therapist thought I had that neurological disease where one doesn’t feel emotions at all. Currently, thanks to the love of a warm, kind, understanding, and (most of all) accepting man, I am discovering the feelings that I had long repressed. Lol, it’s a bit like being an adolescent. I cry at Hallmark commercials now!

  • Elana Berko

    I would love a copy. “I’ve found that many emotionally sensitive people believe they can’t make decisions but they actually avoid decisions because of the emotional consequences of those decisions.” This is new to me. I never thought of this. But it makes sense.

  • Jenny Chenard

    I would love to win this book! 🙂

  • Becky Towles-Reed

    I have always been a sensitive person. I am just realizing this now and I am 42 years old. I was always told to hide your emotions. Over the years I have been plagued with anxiety. I would love this book. I think it could help me finally realize who I am and that it is okay.

  • Dennis C

    I think Socrates said it best: “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle”

  • nanita

    I think what is also really interesting is that some people are “sensation seekers” and some are not.
    to me it happens really often that I just want to read a book and after that I’m so upset that I start crying or have to relax because I feel so much for the characters, and I knew it before reading that it would be like that, but I just have to do it.

  • Dennis C

    It sounds like you are on the right path now

  • Dennis C

    Bravo!

  • Rebelle Fleur

    I’m an extremely emotionally sensitive person so much so that my husband and in laws kicked me out of the house with my baby because they could not cope up with my sensitive behaviour. I belong to Pakistan and we don’t have any therapy or free counselling concepts here. I’ve been struggling with depression trying to overcome the rejection I faced and in this struggle of mine tiny Buddha helped me a lot. I worship this site I swear this has changed my life. I’m v positive about my life now. I’m addicted to this site. It has become a ritual to read a few articles before I doze off n now I really wanna win this book. Also I’m looking forward to start writing on this website soon just trying to gain some confidence 🙂 Cheers x

  • Jim G

    Great interview – opened my eyes to a few things! Can’t wait to read the book!

  • Redlulu

    Definitely coming to realize how emotionally sensitive I am. I wish it didn’t have such a negative stigma. The whole “I feel like I have to watch what I say around you” makes me feel like I am the one causing the problem.

  • Nikki

    Only now at 31 have I started to see my sensitivity as an asset rather than a negative. I’ve always thought it made me a weak person and that I needed to ‘harden’. I’m now learning to own my sensitive nature, realising it helps me to have empathy and to be a caring person. I’m lucky that I can read the quieter signals when someone is in need. My partner taught me to embrace rather than hate how sensitive I am when he told me that it made me a kinder person.

  • christine stoner

    Thanks for the help nearly every day, I plan to read that book and would love a copy!

  • Rianna Hampton

    I have books on HSP and how to thrive in the world as one. But I haven’t read them. It’s only been over the past couple of years that I’ve realized how much being an overly sensitive person affects my relationships in all areas of my life. Time to learn about this side of myself so I can stop making the same mistakes.

  • galfromaway

    Oh, how beneficial this would be for me right about now… 🙂

  • Audrey

    This book sounds amazing! I used to mistake my sensitivity with anxiety and having a better understanding of myself has made a tremendous impact on how I feel about myself.

  • Mirela Blitzstein

    I too am an “emotionally sensitive” person… It didn’t make sense until I was diagnosed with PTSD… I now understand my emotions a little better (still have a lot to learn) and don’t feel as ashamed to feel so deeply… Really looking forward to reading the book!

  • Bhumi Patel

    I’ve struggled endlessly with my emotional sensitivities, and I’m finally beginning to conquer them. I’m so grateful for texts such as this book on the topic.

  • Jane

    It’s nice to finally be able to actually entertain the possibility that there’s nothing actually ‘wrong’ with me. I have often wondered why I seem to see the world differently than most of the people around me. it’s very nice to know I’m not alone.
    Thank you.

  • Luiz Hinez

    I found Tiny Buddha this morning after googling to find guidance on pervasive feelings of disappointment in other people. I experience this from an emotional sensitivity to their words / behaviour. To then find this article is a sign – I must read this book – and my immediate takeaway is to be more mindful of judgements, pause, and split them into thought and emotional components, rather than accept at face value. Thank you for posting.

  • Jeevan/Mirthu/Gupt

    “When I first realized I wasn’t alone with my emotional sensitivity, it was like someone rubbed a soothing balm on the achy heart I wore on my sleeve. And it was even more liberating to realize I could leverage my sensitivity for good, as I have through Tiny Buddha. Suddenly, it wasn’t something I had to hide; it was something I could openly acknowledge and harness in a positive way.” Indeed, you have..:-). Question #4 in particular RESONATED with me, thank you for sharing Lori Didi.

  • Dennis C

    You are not alone, bless you!

  • Joyce Sullivan

    Wow I would really love to win this. After some months of trying to improve myself, I have had way too many tests (aka things going wrong) within the past weeks and feel like alot of my work was lost. Reading this, something really clicked as if I saw myself in the mirror. I really think this book could help me get on my path again.

  • Irene

    I have just recently understood that I am an emotionally sensitive person, and just realizing it has been very helpful. Also, from what Karyn D. Hall says, I am the avoidant type. I would love to read Karyn D. Hall’s book 🙂

  • Gail Fry

    Sensitivity, as a failing, was a message reinforced initially by my older siblings and older parents and then later, a message reinforced in the corporate workplace. The modern world of expedience and efficiency does indeed rely on logic and analytics! The irony of sensitivity being biological and therefore having a strong genetic influence does not escape me!! I still struggle with this label well into my forties despite having crafted a successful career, and having a wonderful network of friends and a loving family of my own. Feelings of shame and thoughts of inferiority, introduced to us as children, remain so powerful throughout our lives. I’m so excited to read this book as hopefully it gives me the skills to navigate my relationship with my own children and the ability to treat myself a little more gently. Thanks!

  • Cheryl

    I am approaching the age of 60 and have only recently found understanding of myself being a HSP. Having navigated my life up to now filled with shame, I’m finally learning what is mine and not mine in regards to emotion. Still, finding balance in what helps me feel safe. Compartmentalizing the emotions, checking in with my Self for valid reasons for my feeling an emotion helps to clarify if it is mine. And not allowing myself to take on the energy of others helps. I tend to be highly empathic with not only people, animals but also with environment and weather patterns. Plus understanding emotion as “energy in motion” allows me to not let emotions blow out of proportion . Let it move thru and out, letting go. as does understanding I am NOT my emotions! Allowing the empathy to just BE, the world needs more of such!
    The addition of an incredible Goldendoodle pup brings great joy! Unconditional love and loads of fun and laughs!

  • Erika

    When people say, “You’re overreacting,” respond with pride, “Actually, this is exactly how I feel—I feel emotions intensely.”

    Sitting on the train reading this I almost cried of relief. (An intense emotion haha) Realising I’ve struggled a lot in my life to resist those feelings and it hit me that I’ve never even considered the strain of thought that it just is. It is just me feeling intensely – not overreacring.

    To receive this book would be a blessing and I believe it wpuld give me even more of those precious aha-moments and feelings of acceptance.

  • April

    This book sounds so uplifting, would love to win it

  • fabian alvarado

    Being sensitive has given me a hard time in relationships. I couldn’t break up with my girlfriend, seeing her crying was devastating, being this sensitive made things worse. It took a few months(7) until it did not affect me anymore. I “shut down” my feelings, as if, which is not healthy either. What I’ve read, gave me hope.

  • Victoria Jacob

    I have lived a difficult life so far. This book sounds like it could potentially change my life. I have been struggling with depression and social anxiety for as long as I can remember. The dbt route is the way forward. This could teach me the tools I need to give myself a proper life. Housebound At present.

  • Gayla Alex Caldwell

    I love this.! Yay for the sensitive souls

  • Helen

    Seems to run in my family with my kids and myself.

  • Greg Bennett

    I think this has key insights on helping sensitive or anxious people cope using a mindfulness-based approach in the workplace. It’s pretty powerful stuff, and yet there’s so much more for me to practice on my own. This book seems like a great place to start–especially for people who are looking for a resource.

  • latebloomer

    Ahh, I need this book. I saw it a while ago but got distracted with something else. Thank you so much for this post. I needed it today. So often I question myself, and my reality when I am not validated. Standing up for oneself requires a lot of strength and courage. It’s so easy to say that I just shush myself and listen to the expert. But could it be that I have something to add to the conversation and that this is not “wrong” or “bad”. thanks

  • Chiqinita

    I am so glad to have seen this post today. I’m in the throes of dealing with a situation that I am having a very strong emotional reaction to. I am proud of the level of sensitivity and empathy I have for others, but being so emotionally sensitive has also held me back in many ways. It looks like this book would be a wonderful resource of techniques.

  • Judie Witt

    i would love to get this book. whether i get it here or hopefully at a library. i am on a mental health disability which does not afford me to buy books. i am reading everything i can on BPD as i have been recommended to do to understand my diagnosis. This book sounds very informative for someone like myself who feels emotion so intensely that it is so painful it feels i could die in that moment & it takes so long sometimes days to come out of an intense negative/sad emotion. My life feels like it is wasting away waiting to find help. i am on a waiting list for DBT & have been for months, but like i said, in the mean time reading up on what i can to do for myself what i can to persevere. thanks JUdie

  • Teresa Dean Smeigh

    I am overly sensitive, although my meds seem to have toned it down some. I used to cry if someone looked at me. Now I read or hear about something sad and it doesn’t affect me anymore. I barely cried when my mother passed and I blame that on the drugs.

  • forgot about drea

    I definitely spent a good portion of my life thinking there was something wrong with me because of this

  • Sandy

    Wonderful article. Well, even I realised today that I am not alone having this problem.

  • Camilla

    My emotions are overwhelming me tonight.

  • Tracy

    Not sure if I’m too late for the giveaway, but count me in! I’m lucky enough to have learned about my sensitivity about a decade ago, from Elaine Aron’s book. So I’ve accepted it’s how I am and don’t feel abnormal or shamed by it. Would love to learn some more coping strategies, though. Points 5 and 7-9 intrigued me most.

  • Madison Chibirka

    Great article.

  • Abby

    Sounds like the perfect book for me!

  • Michelle

    Really wonderful article! Self-awareness is such an important step in learning to manage emotions and hearing advice from others who understand is so helpful

  • Jess

    Great interview! Sounds like an interesting book, one I’d definitely read.

  • dan

    A universally important topic! 😀

  • This sounds like a wonderful book to read. I’ve lived with so much painful emotion, it would be nice to learn to use my sensitivity for good.

  • ShiDana

    My Entire life I have been one big ball of emotions. And I thought that was just the way of life. Growing up, I had strong feelings, but could never quite understand why I was having those feelings. I went through life feeling inadequate because 1) I’m overwhelming emotions 2) could not explain why. Everyone just summed it up to, oh she’s just sensitaive. Today, I’m described as emotional. I feel, that I am more of an empath. I have the ability to relate to others without them even saying a word…

    It never bothered me, the words senstive or emotional. But what did bother me is the tone associated with it. Now that I am older, I’ve learned to take what other’s say with a grain of salt. Everyone has an opinion.
    This article shed some light on trying to work through these emotions. The thought is appealing because I didn’t think it was possible to try. I thought this is something that I’d have to work through and live with for the rest of my life, which is scary. Because these emotions also effect my thinking. It’s rare, but it’s caused me to act/react in ways that are outside of my norm.

  • Jason N Stephanie Carr

    I struggle with this daily no one understands me and I’d love help. Im extremely interested in reading this book! It sounds amazing!

    Steph

  • Fotini

    Thank you for the post! It’s great to know I’m not the only one. So many times I’ve heard that I’m overreacting… I don’t think of it as an asset yet, but hopefully I’ll get there with the book!

  • Val Kowalewich

    May peace overrun all your emotions.

  • Debra Schramm

    Hello I’m looking for a friend, I am a true believer that just sharing friendship is what makes life worth living. I am extremely lonely and isolated. I have two babies one and two and I live with an abusive husband. I’ve been to domestic violence shelters and they are not very helpful. If you can relate at all pls let me know. I want to provide a ear and also would like one back. Thanks peace and love to all

  • ShiDana

    what do you do when you are overly emotional and your partner is on the other end of the specturm? i.e. unable to relate and lacks compassion. How do you find a medium so you don’t get discouraged, hurt and want to bail; and your partner is frustrated and wants to leave?

  • I have been defending for quite a few years now my emotional sensitivity as my greatest tool in writing scripts and working with actors as a director (and, of course, live life to the fullest!). I could not imagine doing these things without the great array and intense feelings that I experience, good or bad, they all very useful and I experience them as gift of being alive and connected with my deeper self.

  • Cheryl Barron

    I’ve gotten too good at hiding my emotions. I was picked on at school, teased at home (parents believed it would toughen me up) . I wanted to beinvisable

  • Francesca

    This is fantastic! I’ve read about this from time to time, and would really love to read this book!
    I came across this after reading more into my relationship with my partner who has Asperger’s syndrome. Apparently, they tend to find themselves with people more sensitive to cues because they can recognize its something valuable… I hope I can see it as valuable one day.

  • barbara

    So good to know about this book. I grew up hearing my mother say with disdain, “You’re so sensitive!” It was clear that this trait was BAD, and I thought it was just me. Though I know better now, I still struggle often with the pain of feeling things too deeply, especially in a society that doesn’t understand this trait.

  • lovetheenvironment

    Thank you for this article. I am just now learning that I should be proud of who I am and not let what others say bother me. I am finding strength in my sensitivity. I am always on the lookout for articles about this subject. Thanks again.

  • Lynda

    I have been a deeply emotionally person my entire life. It is a lonely life. I feel no one understands me. It’s hard…

  • There are so many useful points addressed here and Karyn D. Hall’s mention of how shame being meant to keep people from “behaving in ways that would get you kicked out of groups critical to your survival” makes for such a clear way to understand how it plays a part in our day-to-day relations with other human beings. I like how she touched on the way people’s discomfort with their own emotions causes them to be critical of yours. Many men and women can probably relate to being on both (or either) sides of that coin.

    One of my favorite parts is where she says “Awareness that you are experiencing an emotion that actually belongs to someone else is helpful in letting go of it.” #7 is also interesting in distinguishing between thoughts versus feelings. While I find #8 helpful, I do still think that there is some truth that some people really are jerks, regardless of whether you’re feeling certain emotions, such as embarrassment, or not. Still, the tips offered are most helpful in getting a handle on emotions, given that judgement is so prevalent in our society. Karyn’s book sounds like it would be good to read!

  • mdb

    Honestly Being sensitive & introvert are the worst kind of mental illness thrust upon an individual. . For me I have tried & failed to an extent that I am waiting for answers from the universe did it ever fit in the plan. I feel it is a miracle to get it over with . kudos you have done it . All the best to others in search .

  • JennyRJ

    Thanks for the insightful article – would love the opportunity to read the book 🙂 I think it’s so important for sensitive people not to be railroaded into thinking they have to be ‘cured’ or have to continually ‘work on’ themselves. I am on the path to changing my career to one that values the skills and attributes that comes from being sensitive.

  • athena

    I have been facing the consequences ( good and bad ) of being an emotionally sensitive and vulnerable person. very few people understand me when i say i feel emotional pain. and at this point of life i am ALL ALONE with my emotional issues which caused enough havoc in my life. i feel extremely empty and hopeless

  • Lena Sheffield

    It’s so sad that emotions are not well tolerated outside of therapy. What you wrote so eloquently is simple but so often misunderstood. You addressed many important factors – feelings are biologically evoked, many people jugde others as being too sensitive because they cannot tolerate their feelings, thoughts and beliefs triggered, being sensitive is a wonderful aspect of being alive, when emotions are uncomfortable the thinking and beliefs part of the brain start to escalate everything and people tend to find a way to shut down the process, and “feeling like” is a thought not a feeling. I will recommend your book to clients and friends who believe “emotional sensitivity” is a bad thing. Thank you for your gifts.

  • Meg Dee

    Being emotionally sensitive has often felt like a curse to me due to it’s intensity, it would be nice to finally have a way of managing it.

  • stefan

    “…intense emotions, meaning you react faster to emotional situations, your emotions are more intense, and your emotions take longer to fade”
    Sound very contradictory, because usually people who react faster and stronger express more emotions, faster release theme self. Hence, those who don’t seems to react fast and with high magnitude are senseless???

  • Randy Grasser

    Amazed am I to finally understand that there are many others that “feel” the way I do. Like being stranded on an iceberg for years while fending off the emotional polar bears destine to devour you and suddenly cast into a warm room with the glow of a fire and a safe friend….. As I read your interview I was captivated! Never before have I read such a descriptive tale of…..me! No doubt I will be buying your book, for I…like many… am tired…no exhausted from the emotional drain that seems to be out of control.

  • Muhammad Ali

    Well, first to all, we all HSPs must give thanks to you and others who came up with this great discovery and awareness campaign. I think it is a service to mankind.

    Knowing that is a kind of self-discovery for me. Finding your true self is the first step to self management. Like all other HSPs, I always thought that I was somewhat different or weaker compared to others and no-one understood me. My life has been painful so far due to the fact that I am an HSP and I was unable to manage it.

    When someone is an HSP and he/she does not know it; is like adding insult to the injury. Because unless you avoid all kind of unfavorable situations/conditions, you cannot manage yourself. The negative effect on me was much more stronger because I was born in to a less-privileged family in a third-world country, Pakistan.

    Therefore, I think this documentary must be dubbed/subtitled in Urdu/Hindi language for the South Asian audience. Here many HSPs themselves and even doctors, therapists and psychologist are yet not aware of this trait.