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Discover Your Emotional Age: Heal Yourself & Change Your Life (Interview & Book Giveaway)

The Emotional Edge

Update – The winners for this giveaway are:

  • Toni Nash
  • Katherine Poff

When I first discovered Crystal Andrus Morissette's new book The Emotional Edge, I was intrigued. I knew the book would offer a process for discovering our “Emotional Age,” a term that was new to me, but I didn't realize it would provide a powerful roadmap for healing the wounded parts of our psyche and growing into our most empowered, authentic self.

From the Amazon page:

The Emotional Edge empowers you to stop reacting in knee-jerk ways that hurt and instead start expanding your life to become the greatest expression of you possible. Once you know your Emotional Age, you can take any needed steps to become an authentic adult so you stop giving your power away.

You’ll learn:

  • Whether you’re a Parent, Child, or Adult ‘archetype’—take the Emotional Age Quiz and find out
  • When you’re inadvertently sabotaging yourself and why
  • How to channel fear and anger into courage and willingness
  • How to change your communication scale and style from passive or aggressive to assertive, accepting, and ultimately peaceful
  • Methods for fine-tuning into your unique needs mentally, emotionally, and physically
  • Ways to live your best life without guilt, shame, or blame
  • And lastly, how to rewrite and re-route your relationship, work, and bliss paths

Never feel like a victim of circumstance, genetics, or your past again. Instead of letting your emotions get the best of you, now it’s time to get the best of them!

Fascinating and insightful, The Emotional Edge brings you on a journey of self-discovery and offers the tools to help you break your unhealthy patterns and show up differently in the world.

Since Crystal provided incredibly detailed responses to my interview questions about her work and her book, I'm going to keep this introduction brief and get right to them. But first…

The Giveaway

To enter to win one of two free copies of The Emotional Edge:

  • Leave a comment below
  • For an extra entry, tweet: Enter the @tinybuddha giveaway to win a free copy of The Emotional Edge http://bit.ly/1RDtEa2

You can enter until midnight PST on Monday, April 11th.

The Interview

Trigger warning: this section mentions sexual abuse, which may be triggering to some people.

1. Tell us a little about yourself and what inspired you to write this book.

I’m a happily married Canadian woman with two spectacular daughters (who are now nineteen and twenty-one), a wonderful husband, and a thriving business as the founder of an international coaching institute, exclusively for women.

I’ve written four books and I live a blessed life out in the country. But things weren’t always this peaceful, happy, and successful . . .

I left home at fifteen after experiencing a series of devastating events: my parents’ turbulent divorce, when I was twelve, when my stay-at-home ‘Christian’ mother became a promiscuous party girl and fitness competitor who invited far too many men home. My father moved away to a new city and never seemed to worry or wonder where I was anymore.

This is when my life turned upside down: I was sexually abused almost immediately by my mother’s new twenty-four-year-old boyfriend; stranger-raped at fourteen at my first high school party; and then raped nightly by the father of the children I was sent to take care of (to be ‘the nanny’) at age fifteen. I only stuck around for a few months before heading out on my own.

By seventeen, I’d found out I had the early signs of cervical cancer and the HPV virus. It would take two years for the cells of my cervix to stop turning against me.

The bad luck, so to speak, followed me into my twenties, where I experienced a traumatic head injury at age twenty-one that fractured my skull, ocular, and cheekbone and damaged the nerves in the right side of my face. This injury would later cause abnormal activity on my left temporal lobe, which left me with seizures.

But it wasn’t until I had my own daughters in my mid-twenties and I gained over 100 pounds that I knew I had to look at myself, my life, and my inability to properly protect myself.

I had to heal myself and my legacy to make sure my daughters didn’t go through the suffering that I did. (We know now that ‘epigenetic programming’ messes up the DNA of children of wounded mothers.)

I needed to be the mother I needed in order to give my daughters a great start in their own lives.

It was then I began looking at the concept of Emotional Age (EA) and how I was showing up in the world.

2. What does “Emotional Age” mean, and why is it important that we each discover our own?

Emotional age is a similar concept to biological age. But rather than predicting how young or old our physical bodies are, emotional age helps us understand how empowered or disempowered we are emotionally. It helps explain how we’ve been communicating, compromising, socializing, and interacting with others.

Discovering your own emotional age is the most important step in improving your relationship with yourself, your life (health, wealth, etc.), and your relationships.

When I was heading in my late twenties (now nearly twenty years ago), I began working exclusively with women.

As I mentioned, I had gained over 100 pounds during my pregnancies, which was very hard coming from a ‘body beautiful’ background. (I’d previously competed in fitness shows such as the Miss Galaxy and was a Registered Holistic Nutritionist and Fitness Specialist.)

It was then that I started doing a lot of work around the idea of ‘weight gain as protection’ rather than focusing on food/calories, which led me to the concept of emotional age.

I began to pay close attention to patterns in the way people treated themselves and others. I noticed how their emotions and level of empowerment dictated their choices rather than their intelligence quotient (IQ) or emotional intelligence (EI).

I noticed how some young adults seemed to carry the weight of the world (almost literally) on their shoulders in a more parenting persona.

Regardless of their age, or if they even had children, these folks were so selfless, so protective of others but not of themselves, and so extremely giving to the point of self-abnegation that I began to refer to these people as having too much “mother or father energy”—or being in a Parent archetype.

At the same time, I noticed others who seemed to have an almost opposing dominant emotional archetype that I called The Child—“daughter or son energy.” These people tended to be more selfish, frenetic, extremely emotional, and often more charming or coy than the parent archetypes.

As I worked with my clients, I began really working on myself too—looking at my own patterns and my own emotional age. It was then that I not only lost my excess weight, I made peace with myself.

I knew my weight wasn’t about calories; it was reflective of the energy or level of empowerment that I was embodying. The same is true about our finances, relationships, health, etc.

Once I shifted into this emotional place, I noticed other successful, joyful, grounded people who also showed up in the world in what I call “woman or man energy”—the adult archetype; the fully integrated and empowered person. I knew it was time to write a book and teach others about their emotional age!

3. Can you tell us a little about the “Empowerment Scale,” and how we can use this tool to better understand ourselves and improve our communication style?

The Empowerment Spectrum is the tool I created to help determine emotional age. It is composed of two primary concepts.

The first is that we each embody three dominant archetypes—the Parent, The Child, and The Adult. And the second is that we each have a style we use to engage with all those with whom we have a relationship that varies from passive to peaceful. I call this the Communication Scale. It runs up through the center of the Empowerment Spectrum.

Our level of communication reveals how we are showing up in the world; it is the easiest indicator of our emotional age. But communicating our true needs can be incredibly difficult, and many of us fall into unhealthy and self-limiting patterns and behaviors.

The great news is that once you become mindful of where you are resonating on the Empowerment Spectrum, you can climb the scale and show up as an Adult rather than a Parent or Child—in any and all areas of your life. Remember, emotional age has nothing to do with chronological age.

4. In Chapter Three, you wrote, “Unhealed experiences keep triggering us into disempowering emotional places.” Can you expand on this?

Over the course of our lives, we have trajectory changing moments that cause us to feel guilt and shame. In these painful moments, we disown parts of our self and bury them in our proverbial basement—our unconscious mind. Shame, shame, shame on me!

We bury our Warrior. We bury our Princess. We bury our Charmer. We bury our Perfectionist. And so on. We just keep burying parts of ourselves so that we don’t have to feel badly. Who wants to feel badly about themself? No one does! 

I never want to feel that again, so I will disown that part of me.

Eventually, we have all these compartmentalized aspects of our lives and of ourselves. We are no longer whole. Complete. Expansive. We are little tiny fragments. Frozen. Shards of glass. Shards of light.

We are wounded, looking out at the world trying to figure out who or what will help us feel whole, safe, and loved again. In fact, we need others to heal us because they become the mirror for us to see where we are still wounded.

People who trigger us remind us of when we were shamed in the past. They trigger our wounds—neuro-associations to a past pain—something we haven’t yet healed and something we never want to feel again.

In other words, something within them elicits the wounds within us. We feel a prick of that pain again in the here and now (and sometimes it’s a lot more than a prick); all the old unhealed ‘stuff’ comes flying out. This is why we have to clean up our own yards before we expect anyone else to.

5. In your “communication scale,” you’ve shown passive and peaceful communication as opposite ends of the spectrum. I think many of us mistakenly assume these are the same things. What, exactly, differentiates the two?

Peace isn’t about everyone being the same, thinking the same, or feeling the same. It isn’t even about everyone liking you or agreeing with you.

Peace is agreeing to disagree. It is honoring our differences and doing our best to find common ground. Peace is acceptance expanded. But you can’t have peace if you’re afraid to speak. You can’t have peace if you’re afraid to listen.

Passivity, on the other hand, depends upon your fear of speaking up or disagreeing, while avoiding any kind of confrontation becomes your primary concern.

Many people think they are peaceful when, in fact, they aren’t. They’ve turned the other cheek, bit their tongue until it bleeds, while continuing to accept unhealthy behavior—often from those who claimed to love them the most!

6. In explaining the fourth step of the WOMAN acronym—your cue for assertiveness—you wrote, “…passive people ask disempowered questions, while empowered people ask empowered questions.” Can you give us an example of a disempowered and empowered question we might ask ourselves, and share how the latter could help us be more assertive?

The brain is a search engine. When you ask it a question, it searches through its databanks, so to speak, for the answer.

We know that when we ask ourselves a disempowered question, our brain will find disempowered answers. The same applies to asking empowered questions. In fact, scientists from the seventies discovered that the way we speak to ourselves about ourselves changes everything!

As an example, if you were to ask yourself: “Why am I such a loser?” or “Why am I so fat?” your brain wouldn’t say, “Sweetheart, you’re not a loser!’ or “You’re beautiful, don’t talk like that about yourself!” Nope! Your brain would search for all the reasons why you are a loser or a fatso!

Alternatively, if you were to ask yourself: “What could I do to lose weight and feel great about myself?” Your brain would give you a list of choices that would help you. For example: exercise and drink more water, eat a salad, meditate, etc. The brain literally searches for answers to our questions without any conscience or kindness.

Once you learn how to ask yourself more empowered questions, your life begins to shift into a more empowered place. And by focusing on your desires rather than on past letdowns, you redirect your thoughts toward possibilities rather than problems.

7. As the last two steps in your four-step boundary setting formula, you recommend asking, “Would you be willing to ___________?” and then stating, “If you can’t do this for me, I will _____________.” Do you have any advice for people pleasers who find it difficult to share and honor their needs in this way, for fear of rocking the boat?

When someone is afraid to set a boundary, it simply means they are still disempowered. They simply don’t (or can’t) say what they really mean and they don’t mean what they say, which is why it is very challenging to have an honest and fulfilling relationship with a people pleaser.

Truth be told, people pleasers don’t always realize how indirect and roundabout their communication style is. They may not even realize how little self-advocacy they are doing.

They’ve spent a lifetime being let down, abused, or ignored, so they swing between trying to be what you want them to be and wanting you to try to figure out who they really are. There is a lot of fear in this communication zone!

The people pleaser needs to establish trust that their ideas are valid and will be heard. In other words, trust that you deserve to be listened to, protected, and respected.

If you’re in an environment where this is not the case—where you do not feel safe—it is not your fault, whether or not you allowed it! Self-shaming and living with guilt will not empower you to make the changes you need to make. Instead, you need to find a safe place to learn how to begin expressing yourself, your feelings, and your needs. But it all begins with you.

You have to give yourself permission to matter! Believe it or not, the most dynamic, successful, happy people have mastered self-advocacy.

8. In Chapter Seven, you wrote, “Your relationship can only be as healthy as the unhealthiest part of you.” I imagine the same is true of our partners. What would you recommend to someone who is doing this work, whose partner will not?

Keep doing your own work, period! Focus on making yourself and your own life happier. One of the best things that we can do is to let the atmosphere in our relationships lift and lighten.

I know it may feel counterproductive, but stop talking about your problems with the person who seems to be at the root of them; you’re angry and need to express yourself! But let’s not kid ourselves: there is nothing new to be gained by arguing.

Focus on radical self-love and watch every aspect of your life—including your relationship—improve. Once your partner feels this subtle yet significant change, he or she will be open and willing to help more, show you more affection, and yes, have those long talks that you desire.

Striving to grow and to heal can be a lifelong process. But as you turn toward your partner, think about how you can provide the kind of loving support that you yourself crave.

9. What is the main message you hope readers take from your book?  

Whatever is repressed will find a way to be expressed. Patterns continue until they are broken. You have to face yourself and your stuff. You have to dig it up and deal with it: You have to move through it. There is no other way. You can’t go over it, under it, around it, or behind it.

We can keep pointing the finger out there, but healing is an inside job! In fact, ninety-nine percent of our problems really have little to do with what is happening in the here and now.

They’re all old wounds—old stories! Neuroassociations. You can even just chalk it up to ‘karma’ because that’s all it is: old toxic crap that needs to be cleaned out. Neutralized. Recontextualized. Healed. Cleared. Crystal-cleared. 😉

You can learn more about The Emotional Edge on Amazon here.

FTC Disclosure: I receive complimentary books for reviews and interviews on tinybuddha.com, but I am not compensated for writing or obligated to write anything specific. I am an Amazon affiliate, meaning I earn a percentage of all books purchased through the links I provide on this site. 

About Lori Deschene

Lori Deschene is the founder of Tiny Buddha and Recreate Your Life Story, an online course that helps you let go of the past and live a life you love. Her latest bookTiny Buddha's Gratitude Journal, which includes 15 coloring pages, is now available for purchase. For daily wisdom, follow Tiny Buddha on Twitter, Facebook & Instagram..

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  • As a personal development enthusiast, I love reading your posts and especially this interview! The Emotional Edge sounds like it provides valuable, practical ways of gaining more self awareness…towards authenticity. As stress is on the increase, we need to learn new / easier methods of coping mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. During these tumultuous times we are looking for effective ways to engage more fully in the hope of living a happy and fulfilled life. This knowledge, to enhance our EQ, is particularly needed if we wish to connect better with others and enhance our relationships, whether at home or in the workplace. It’s only with this knowledge APPLIED, that we gain wisdom. Best wishes with getting this book out there! May it inspire and benefit more of us, on our journey of self discovery and growth.

  • Karen

    This looks very interesting. I would love to read this book.

  • galfromaway

    This would be a very heplful book for me right about now.

  • Isabelle

    This book is touching every aspect of my life I discovered is the root cause of my unhappiness. Everyday is a new beginning and I would gladly welcome the tools this book would provide me in my quest for growth and change.

  • What a wonderful book….I can’t wait to read it, or win it! 🙂

  • talkin’jazzy

    Would love to read this book right now as it seems to deal with a lot of the things I am currently struggling with and working through to develop my authentic self.

  • Peg Whetstone

    love Tiny Buddha–it helps oin so many ways–this book has to be a winner–would love it

  • Pamela Bart

    So important for my family- must look into it

  • Amy

    This sounds fantastic! I can’t wait to read it!

  • Gruvee

    Oh wow, this is timely and I like the insights. I definitely could use this book! Would love to win it!

  • Leo Castro

    I really would like to read this…Sounds amazing.

  • nudgeme

    Great interview Lori, and loved the detailed answers style from Crystal. I love Crystal’s line that the most ….”dynamic, successful, happy people have mastered self-advocacy.” Isn’t that at the route of everything? Being a masterful gatekeeper over your thoughts and emotions (and I’m obviously not referring to not allowing yourself to feel emotions, but rather not to set up home there ;), focusing on growing yourself, getting to know all the different parts of yourself, especially the buried parts. Loved that Crystal said “healing is an inside job”, nothing to do with the external at the end of the day, rather the stories we’re carrying around about that stuff. We’re all processing our “stuff” in different ways, but, as she so rightly says, you can’t get round it, you have to dig it up, take a look and move on from it – there’s the event and then there’s the ‘story’ we tell ourselves about it. Events can be horrible, doesn’t mean they didn’t happen, but we do get to choose our stories so might as well make them good ones. Not always easy I know, but leads to a much happier life! Really enjoyed this post and insights, thank you.

  • Shanelle Vargas

    Ahhhhh!!! What I would do to read something like this. I always catch myself in all kinds of bookstore trying to find books as good as this and no luck :/ lol, I know one of the thousands trying to get this helpful book, I know a lot of us are in pain or just lost trying to find a way. So whoever wins this, let me just say I’ll be more than happy for them (: one to spread the message. I’ve never really won anything so I don’t have high hopes. I just wanted to wish everyone else luck!C:

  • Cynthia Smithson

    The interview excepts reminded me of the guidance provided by Harriet Lerner in her “Dance of Anger” Book. Her message helped me to remove myself from a loveless marriage. Now, 30 years later and retired, I find myself still looking for the authentic me that seems to have been lost over the years.It sounds like Crystal’s book would be an added tool for the journey.

  • Jan Foote

    Very interesting! I would love to learn more.

  • Kris A

    Sounds great 🙂 Would love to learn more about it!

  • Erin Armour

    I am excited to read this book!

  • Nicole

    This truly is an amazing book. For me, it’s like 5 books in one for all the amazing content and insight that Crystal shares based on her life’s work and experiences. I return to it over and over, and consider it among the top 5 influential books of my lifetime.

  • Talia

    What an interesting subject! I’d be very interested in reading more about this!

  • Naima

    I have been hit with a string of bad luck lately and noticed how hard it is to confront situations head on. I compromise myself and my needs way too much. I would love to learn more and see how I can become empowered.

  • Mary A

    This book sounds extremely powerful and supportive. Excited to read it, and thank you for sharing.

  • ymurray

    Wow wow wow…great interview and so informative!

  • Amanda Foster

    So interested in reading more! Would love to learn more!

  • sunnynewday

    Thank you Crystal for all of your insight and knowledge!

  • Samantha Jane Galati

    Thank you for a great interview!

  • kemistri

    What a cool book, I think this would be great for me and being able to help out my clients as a therapist.

  • jane

    can’t wait to read it!

  • Shannon Sullivan

    These are all issues I am currently working on with myself. I really appreciate this information and the interview with the author. Thank you for sharing. This is a great resource.

  • A.B. Penner

    Thank you for the opportunity! I have also tweeted this on my Twitter page @abpennerauthor. :)Take care!

  • Carolyn Quevy

    Just when I think I have my “stuff” cleared, a bit of it bubbles up at the most inopportune time! This looks to be a great tool for getting into the nooks and crannies of one’s emotional closet! Love it!

  • Tracy

    I’ve understood patterns/explanations like this without knowing or naming an exact framework for the inner psychology involved — this book sounds great. And I think it may really help a friend of mine, with whom I’ve having some relationship challenges due to emotional age differences, unhealed experiences, disempowerment, people pleasing, etc. Heck, perhaps I can even benefit myself after reading it! Thanks for the interview and initial insights into these dynamics.

  • EuphonyChloeH

    This sounds like a great read!

  • nirese

    Sounds like an excellent read.

  • mizannie Ⓥ

    Sounds like a great, insightful read. Would love a copy to read and to share with clients.

  • Fiona Tan

    @tinybuddha giveaway. What a great interview. Hope to get this Emotional Edge book

  • FumingSalmon

    That is the conundrum, experiences which shake our existence are the one’s which help us grow. Having an emotional edge in this world is the biggest asset you can have, does places like corporate world support that, I am not sure. Being seen as a sensitive person is a taboo and being vulnerable is being looked down upon. Its is a beautiful topic to write about, I love when people talk about emotions. Even if I don’t win this book in this giveaway, I am planning to get my hand on it and read and absorb the wisdom it has.

  • Suzanne M

    Loved reading the excerpt/interview. What a wonderful way to recognize and own our power, vulnerabilities and bring clarity to our relationships.

  • Priya

    Wow. This was amazing. Can’t wait to read more. 🙂 Thank you.

  • Reflections Of Beauty

    Yay!! I’ve wanted this book for a while!!! I’m taking her telecourse and I think it’d be great to add this book to my collection! Thanks for the opportunity to win one!!

  • Ann

    Sounds like a wonderful resource to have on this journey to a healthier lifestyle. This may become a star in my healing constellation as I continue to learn more about emotional intelligence and work on becoming a lifter. This seems impossible at times yet as Sri Aurobindo writes, “The sense of impossibility is the beginning of all possibilities.”

  • Karen Smith

    I am really getting into this book but got it out of the library and do not know how much longer I will be allowed to keep it. I would love a copy of my own to read it thoroughly and get more out of it. I am currently taking the telecourse as well.

  • Leigh Powers

    Thank you for bringing this writer and book to my attention.

  • Renea Kelley

    A survivor of both emotional and sexual abuse as a child, I tend to fall into old patterns of victim. I need to learn how to overcome my past and empower myself for moving forward in the future. I think this book will help me do that. I’ve already gleaned many insights from the above interview. Thank you.

  • Melanie Loza

    This is amazing information and just what I needed this morning. I had a terrible squabble with my sister yesterday and I knew I was being triggered but I wasn’t sure what to do about it. Just reading this article has helped me immensely and I would love to receive a copy of this book! Thank you from the bottom of my wounded and soon to be healed heart!

  • Alexis

    What an amazing interview!! I’m so happy his was shared on Tiny Buddha. I would LOVE a copy of this book!!!
    Thank you!

    -Alexis

    P.s. My sign in isn’t working so I had to post as a guest.

  • Gail Cookson

    This could definitely help me on my path!

  • Kristi Lynn

    I definitely need to express the repressed, and seems Emotional Edge can offer the right tools and knowledge to understand how. Onward to a better me. Thank you for sharing this in cyberspace, and via Tiny Buddha too.

  • Alyssa Soderlund

    This book sounds fantastic! I am on the recent path of incorporating overall wellness into my life and would like to pass this knowledge on to others.

  • Crystal Bandy Thomas

    I would love to have this book so I can figure out how to heal myself and close the rift between me and my daughter. Thanks!

  • Rachel R

    I’m putting this book on my reading list.

  • netc23

    wow, this sounds phenomenal. I would love to win but will look into buying soon. thanks for the chance!

  • Bashayer A

    Such a beautiful book, I really need it to help me with my negative subconscious patterns! I’m working on being in the here and now, to be in the moment of the source. Thank you for the great chance, would be so helpful. – I’m on Twitter @bashayerbebita <333

  • Katherine Poff

    This sounds fantastic and I could really use it right now.

    I am a student at a private university and have become overwhelmed with homework, as all students feel at some point. Instead of giving myself the “gift” of working little by little on assignments, I stayed in bed. I cried, my body ached and I spent the rest of break catering to the needs of others, while ignoring my own.

    I will always care about others, but now I have decided that I need to care for myself. This way it is possible to better help others.

    For the first time in my life I wrote, “I don’t want to hurt my body anymore.” (With binge eating/restricting, not exercising/overexercising; I am an all or nothing person. I need balance in all areas of my life.)

    Whether I win the giveaway or not, I look forward to reading this book. I also love the integrated psychological approach.

  • Selena

    Reroute Misdirected Fear? !
    Yes please, show me how to do that!

  • Aly

    It’s so important to love ourselves first before all else can fall in place. I’m glad the author did that and found what matters. Keep doing what you are doing! Thanks for sharing, and a copy of the book. 🙂

  • cmevans62

    This is a book that could help so many people–me being one of them. I look forward to reading it at some point.

  • ellie826

    Interesting interview. I’d like to read the book.

  • Nia

    Wow, sounds awesome, and I need all the help I can get!

  • Love Keyah

    great interview! would love to read the book!

  • ccrgirl

    Thanks for the great interview!

  • EC22

    Fifty some years of stuck — I need help now!

  • Sarah

    What an interesting way to look at how we act and react. I can’t wait to read the book.

  • shep

    I recently made the realization that I’ve been a “yes” person all my life and have a lot of emotional baggage that keeps creeping up…I’ve always pushed it down and kept going but it finally caught up with me. I look forward to reading more and finding ways to work my way out of all of these bad habits and negative self-talk.

  • Marta

    “Whatever is repressed will find a way to be expressed.” I tell my clients this all the time. I wish our society valued the internal the way we value the external. I look forward to reading this book.

  • Emma Bowler

    I’d love to win, the book sounds really interesting xx

  • Brenda Brown

    Great interview! I think I could really benefit from this book. I am definitely a overweight people pleaser married to an alcoholic and struggling! I would love to win a copy, but will definitely buy it. Thank you!!!

  • Vera Boyer

    So much great info in the interview.. I would love a copy of the book. 🙂

  • Colleen

    tiny Buddha is the best…I always have found it so deeply profound with how much I have related to so many of the sharing they so freely offer. I appreciate your work and contributions to the betterment of all of us…thank you thank you thank you

  • Shirley Jones

    My advice: buy this book right now, it is a friend indeed!

  • dustybee123

    Thank you tinyBuddha! I always glean some inspiration from your wisdom. The interview with Crystal Andrus Morissette speaks directly to my past and present struggles. I can only imagine how different my existence would be if I had a map to the treasure that is THIS life. It is clear that I have to get this book!

  • Stevtro

    Thank you for posting this interview! I love seeing this information from different perspectives. We all heal levels at a time and new understanding and deepening of these principles occur. Definitely feels fortuitous to be reading about this book now!

  • MaineVoice429

    I’d like to win a copy of this book for my friend Alysia!

  • Alexis

    I love Crystal’s work and energy. Thank you, Tiny Buddha, for all the positive information.

  • Miranda

    WOW…sounds like every human on Earth could benefit from reading this book. “Your relationship can only be as healthy as the unhealthiest part of you.” Gulp.

  • Lala

    It’s almost like Crystal and I, even though we have never met, we are sister’s from anotha motha. I don’t share the same story of course but I have always felt a soul connection to her and read her writings and posts almost daily. With that I have been able to help other women follow their hearts and believe and most importantly empower other woman to be the beautiful woman they were created to be. Thank yoiu for sharing this awesome interview.

  • Fern

    The comment about the parenting persona of some young adults resonated with me. I shouldered so much responsibilty, the earliest I recall is at 4, that I missed the freedom of childhood. I am sure there are many amazing insights to be gained in this book. And how to resolve and heal. Thank you!

  • Lynn Grate

    I can’t wait to read that book! It sure would be nice to have a free copy too. Thanks for the giveaway!!

  • Saragosa

    What an interesting article and concept

  • Janis

    I am very interested in the portion on boundary setting and the process that one must go through in order to establish and maintain healthy boundaries.

  • Tracy Carter

    The Emotional Edge program has enhanced all my relationships!!! Im looking forward to reading the book and going deeper.

  • Maranda Carlson

    Knee-jerk reactions often gets me in trouble, and quizzes are always fun, thanks for the review/interview.

  • Melody

    I want to read this!!

  • Kathy Wallace

    I would love to win this book. It sounds so empowering!

  • Rosanna Ruzzo

    I have grown so much as a person through books of this nature and I am so looking forward to reading The Emotional Edge and promoting it to my book club freinds.

  • Rachael Mears

    Sounds great, just what I need 🙂

  • browniz

    Wow… this article really resonated with me. I have been healing my childhood wounds for the past few years and it’s caused some issues with my relationship with my mom. I recently emailed her about forgiveness and am hopeful for healing our relationship. I know that she has a lot of unresolved wounds (anger, guilt, shame, etc.) from her childhood and poor decisions she has made. I feel sad for her and just wish she could get past those things, forgive others, forgive herself and be happy! Her old wounds come out in ugly mean ways and she seems oblivious to her behaviors so my brother and daughter do not care to be around her anymore. She’s very negative and difficult to be around so we’ve all distanced ourselves from her. I am hopeful she can have some breakthroughs and this book may really help her. ~Thanks!

  • Kristen Swain

    Thank you for this!!!

  • Kim D

    Wonderful lady and I hope I get to read the book soon. Great interview.

  • Toni Nash

    I am going through a huge process of self discovery, healing and new beginnings… This book is something I need to get my hands on. Thank you Crystal once again for hitting the nail on the head!

  • Heidi Rodriguez

    This is amazing and couldn’t have shown up in my email inbox at a better time!

  • In my quest of Seeking light, the universe provides in the form of brilliant use of the mind. This interview was useful and intriguing throughout! So much Gratitude for both parts guided me back to the source of all: Our deepesr fear is not that we are inadequate, our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. Thank You for the light. Thank You for believing.

  • Shannon Jordan

    Soooo stoked!!! Thank you both for an AMAZING interview XOXOXO

  • Candice Rowland

    Very interesting. Thanks for sharing!

  • Stephen Whitehead

    I look forward to reading this book and finding my Emotional Age.

  • colleen

    Great interview

  • rt

    I would so love to win this book to help me realize I may be 55 and separated, but I can still rebuild my life and that there are many opportunities out there for me.

  • Susan Eichhorn Young

    this looks so amazing! I cannot wait to read it!

  • LaffingKat

    Very helpful information. I love the distinction between passive and peaceful.

  • Melissa B

    Such a powerful and inspiring interview! This book sounds amazing and definitely well worth the read. Good luck to whoever wins the copies and thanks so much to Lori for sharing your story. 🙂

  • Lauren Hart

    Really enjoyed reading this. Very interesting and inspiring. Thank you for taking the time to share this.

  • Janet Greenslade

    Such an amazing and eye opening read, thank you. Good luck everyone =)

  • disqus_YuwjDSsDp0

    I need this book. I know my therapist would approve.

  • Joscelyn G.

    Crystal always has a way to cut through to the heart of the matter to help you heal!

  • Maria Joao

    This must be an incredible book! I have to read it! 🙂

  • Marie-Jeanne Brouillette

    That looks like a great book 🙂 I would use this book to improve myself as these past few weeks and months have been hard on me. I want to be able to open up to others and make new friends!

  • Tanya Martello Gauthier

    I’d love to win this book! Thank you!

  • Josephine

    I cannot wait to get my copy of this book! Sounds so awesome! The interview started to open my eyes!

  • Amanda C.

    WOW!! I need to read this book! I struggle almost daily with moving past similar “past living”; and hope to one day foster children to give them the safety I felt I lacked. Thank you for sharing your story and making our world a little less lonely. <3

  • Nancy Fithian

    Lori, thank you so much for this interview! The Emotional Edge sounds like a powerful book to help us heal our unhealthy emotional behaviors and find our joy!

  • Cat

    Love the Tinny Buddha wisdome that Lori Deschene is spreading!

  • Laura Tegart O’Hanlon

    The title of this book intrigued me.
    However, reading the interview I realised that it is so much more. The discovery of self, that this book offers readers sounds amazing. The healing process that must come from within, ‘…Can’t go around it, under over above it, but rather that we must work through it..’ sounds like the only true way to go.
    I have three daughters who I have linked this interview to as well. If I was to win this – there’d be a lot of discovery and recovery going down. Either way, it will be on my list of must buys. Wonderful!

  • Ruth Huggins

    I am in my 70s now and still have a hard time with the abuse I endured as a child. I would love to read your book and try to put it behind me at last.

  • MusicalMinion

    I’ve dealt with anxiety and people-pleasing tendencies for years. When she talked about “The Parent” type, I felt like that described me exactly. Going to see a therapist really helped unpack all that baggage I was carrying from childhood, but it’s always a day-to-day task to keep on going and not to listen to anxiety that leads to me being the “parent” or need to please everyone. Some days it’s easy, some days it’s impossible to avoid.

  • Jenny

    “Your relationship can only be as healthy as the unhealthiest part of you.” This really hit home for me. Excellent interview!

  • Lisa Miller

    So where’s the link to find out our emotional age?

  • Thea

    This book sounds like a major gift to me and my self esteem. Having been a people pleaser all my life and my mother’s caregiver for the last 15 years I have now found myself facing a new chapter in my life. My mother died this February and I am lost.

  • Sand

    This sounds like a very helpful book!

  • Annika Odhner

    This book looks priceless. It’s only after many years of working in the human services field that I’m finally realizing how much healing I still need myself after a traumatic childhood.

  • Isabel Rose Castaneda

    Wow, this is exactly what I needed to read because of certain issues that seem to be taking place in my life and uncertainty on how to go about to bring improvement and to be happy with my true self
    Thank you so much for writing this book 🙂

  • Jin

    This book sounds amazing, so much rings true, something for everyone to take out of it

  • Rebecca Gourd

    Wow! Such great insights in this post!!

  • Abhisek Datta

    wow, awesome one 🙂

  • Terri

    This sounds like exactly what I need right now to start living life and be happy!

  • Ashley Endres

    Looks like a very worthwhile read. Would love to be entered for drawing.

  • W.T.

    I’ve been in constant toxic work environments that mirror the dynamic between me and my mother growing up. I’m in a really bad one now, and for the first time, though affected by it of course, I’m not hurt, or internalizing others’ opinions of me. Liberating. Interesting interview.

  • amy

    This is exactly what I have been thinking about lately. Recently feeling as if I have unresolved past issues that are still affecting me today.

  • Cheryl Barron

    I’ve accepted that things need to change. Only recently have I realized that I am my own ‘knight in shining armour’

  • This was an excellent interview. 🙂 If I win the book, great, if I don’t, I’m buying it. 🙂

  • Would be interested in reading The Emotional Edge!

  • Paula Renee

    This book sounds very interesting!

  • Heather Taylor

    Very interested in this book.

  • Brenda

    Love to read this book!

  • Jillian Berkowitz

    Such a great interview! I’m really looking forward to reading this book.

  • Flavia

    If I don´t win this book, I am going to buy it 🙂

  • Val Kowalewich

    Mmmm….edgy….I like.

  • Kmadigan

    Can’t wait to read this! Thank you for taking the time to reflect and share your journey.

  • Tgn1222

    I have to read this book immediately! I do yoga, read, therapy, journal and meditate and nothing helps break the patterns no matter how aware I am. I need to get to the root cause to fully heal so I can live my life the way it should be lived.

  • Jennifer Hawkins

    This sounds like an amazing book that will touch on things that I really need some guidance on personally. (Also, I’m curious if the author is related to Alanis Morissette )

  • Aparna

    Interesting to read. I am at the precise spot where I have discovered that my patterns in relationships and food( I have a eating disorder) is not because I am flawed but simply because of the unhealed parts of my childhood. I am trying to get aligned with my inner child. Reading this book, would take me a step further in my journey.

  • Antoniya Koleva Zorluer

    Such an inspiring interview! Thank you so much for sharing, every story touches everyone in a different way, but this time I’m truly grateful for reading….

  • This book looks wonderful – and such an inspirational interview.

  • Resident_Hippie

    I love this concept & want to learn more. It’s no mistake the tweet showed up!

  • Chandler

    This is an very inspiring interview! I have no doubt that the book has exactly the information I need to know in order to help me understand and help me be able to help others with the knowledge I can learn by reading! I will be telling family and friends about this book! Thanks much!

  • Lorri

    Amazing interview! I purchased the book and read only 1 chapter before I gifted it to an amazing woman that was struggling, who desperately needed the wisdom of Crystal. I would love to win so I can finish it and shift my own life (and then maybe gift the book to another woman <3 )

  • Laura

    Great interview. Can’t wit to read the book!

  • Lisa P.

    This book sounds like the perfect read for me right now! Crossing my fingers I win!

  • Lisa P.
  • Jena B

    Wow, great interview. Can’t wait to read the book!

  • Kate

    I would love to have this book — it looks like something that would help me find another piece of the puzzle that is me.

  • Chandra Milliron

    Fingers crossed about the give away and hopeful it will help in the pathway to betterment as I have recently finished 3/4 of the book “Adventures for the Soul”. I’ve begun to deepen my understanding of worth and the power of self-help. Much love <3