Oh and of course, well done Bogart!!! 😄 🤍

Dear Anita

Happy New Year! 🤍

I’m sure that you and Bogart are going to have lots of amazing adventures together. 😊

I’m glad to hear that you’re starting to feel better. Just in time. 🤍

Oh good! I’m glad you both went out for some fun. Well he almost made it. Hopefully next time the full way. We believe in you Bogart! 🤞 😅 🤍

Hi Confused

Well, you trusted her enough to share some difficult feelings you were exploring. 🩵

Have you told her you shared some things with her whilst you were anxious that you didn’t mean? 🩵

The difficulty being that a lot of negativity can be hurtful in relationships. There is a ratio of 5:1 positive to negative interactions during disagreements and 20:1 positive to negative interactions outside of conflict that is present in healthy relationships.

Relationships can heal from difficulties and grow stronger if you put the effort in. So try to relax and focus on positive interactions now that you’ve got some things off your chest. 🩵

It does sound like you have some anxiety, but a lot of the time our negative thoughts are not true. So it is about staying calm and letting the feeling and thoughts pass without picking at them.

Perhaps there is a feeling that if you go over things that you might be able to fix something? Or try to stop something bad from happening?

What I learned though from my own experiences, is that it only causes suffering in advance as well as any future suffering. It is called catastrophising. 🩵

The more important something seems, the more likely you are to worry about it. So the trick is to deprioritise how important it is. Ah well. Don’t have to fix things today all at once. It will sort itself out in time, with a bit of positive energy. 🩵

How can you help people you don’t even know? 🩵

Hi James

You can philosophise all you want.

Miracles are not news to me. There is no point being proven. 🩵

Hi James

I think that people have different perspectives on this.

A lot of people have been through some pretty challenging abuse here.

I understand what you’re trying to get at. But I don’t necessary agree. 🩵

If you have a child, they bite you, they slap you, keep you up all night. Even a teenager shouting and swearing or hitting. Developmentally appropriate. But when we are adults, we are supposed to manage our emotions and behaviour because we understand that these things are harmful to others.

It is sad that adults don’t receive the same unconditional love that children do. But it also serves a purpose. It protects people from harm.

Is intentionally behaving in ways that are triggering to people who have PTSD an expression of love? Or is it causing unnecessary harm?

Calling Anita the devil was harsh and the timing was poor. She was already having a bad day. 🩵

Judging what you think is best for people isn’t necessarily appropriate all the time. It is easy to misjudge things and mistakes. It helpful to try and understand others perspectives. 🩵

Personally, I don’t like to play games or argue.

Hi Tommy

Thanks for sharing the story! You are right, it is easy for people to be hurt even when you are trying to be kind. 🩵

I have always struggled with things like that. I’m learning that it helpful to try to understand others perspectives to avoid these faux pas. But even then all we can do is try our best and of course stay calm and try to take care of others if we accidentally hurt their feelings. 🩵

Thinking about how to do this without speech for the story. I guess pay attention to body language? It is said that we mostly communicate through body language and not our words. Where does that leave us writing online? 🩵