Yana asked for the arguing to stop on page 11 yesterday.

Please, let’s not argue 🙏🦋

I have to stop, too… I have been too effected… flashbacks from bullying… the atmosphere is too intense…

Let’s rest, please.

Reminder to you both that this is Yana’s thread and that she asked for the fighting to stop. ❤️

I feel like the difficulty for Anita might be that she feels like she isn’t being heard at all. That it feels like she has to take responsibility for everything and that her pain hasn’t been acknowledged by you Tee.

I would like to share my perspective on what happened in this conflict. I apologize for the bluntness. ❤️

The situation itself is difficult.

Everyone is vulnerable here, everyone is hurt.

Engaging on a public forum is hard.

Engaging with people who she has previously had conflict and has not built a rapport with might be a trigger for Anita.

Historically, criticism on her personal thread has been a trigger for her.

Engaging with people who she has previously had a conflict with in a conflict might be a trigger for Anita.

C-PTSD, Tourettes and ADHD can lead to feeling being bigger than they normally are for others and last longer. I want to be clear. It is not her fault that Anita has these conditions.

Tee and Anita you both believe in naming harm and defending yourselves strongly.

I am straightforward, I don’t choose my words well and principled. So I leave everyone feeling badly, even myself. I reported the conflicts to Lori and asked for nothing. I am sorry, I just believe that everyone has a right to feel safe and be treated with respect.

Clearly, neither of you trust each other. That will have to change to progress.

Anita – I truly honestly believe that Tee is a good person and she only reacted this way because she was trying to defend herself. When she no longer needs to defend herself she will stop.

Tee has indicated that she is open to compromising when she feels heard.

Can you help Tee to feel heard Anita? Tee is happy to work towards a resolution with you then.

I can understand the need to fight people that you are afraid of. It takes courage and strength to admit that perhaps fears got in the way and the situation was misunderstood.

* prolonged

Sometimes we even move without thinking. I wonder James. What your perspective is of the function of the mind? ❤️

English is also not Anita’s first language. Perhaps we could try actually listening to what she has to say with an open mind that she is being honest.

Notice that she just said that she just remembered how this argument began in the first place. Perhaps you had forgotten how it started? ❤️

Hi Tee

I think what Anita is trying to say is that she chose her words carefully.

She doesn’t remember if it was both of us, or if it was me.

She is being honest. ❤️