as I am at the same point as you, recovering from an intense relationship that turned out to be toxic – let me express my feelings evoked by your post.
A description of his behaviour seems obvious to me – permanent manipulation. Putting you on an emotional swing – wants and doesn’t want commitment, going mute , “punishing” you? Seems to care of his wellbeing only.
Where is your place in this kind of relationship?
Wishing you self compassion and self love – all the best.