Thank you Anita. Do you have any other advice on how to cope when/if I do try to come off of them again? How did you do it?

I have a long history with anxiety and depression which is controlled through antidepressants. I get worse in the Autumn/Winter months, despite Vit D supplements. The feeling of dread started during the Autumn last year. I thought it might be my medication, so decided to very slowly decrease them, with the goal of coming off of them completely. I went from 100mg to 75mg over 4 months, with a gradual decline in my mood, and a constant feeling of dread/foreboding which led to severe anxiety. Also accompanied by a lack of joy or pleasure in things I used to enjoy, feelings of dread and doom at the thought of doing simple tasks such as washing dishes. My medication has been increased to 150mg, I’ve noticed a huge improvement after 3 weeks of taking the increased dose. I still get bad days, but much more manageable. I’m scared to ever try coming off them ever again. I’ve been medicated since I was 16 (I’m 25 now).

Is it possible that my moderate clinical depression can be managed through mindful meditation alone? Or will I forever need to be medicated due to a possible chemical imbalance?