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August 29, 2014 at 12:20 pm #64102ValerieParticipant
Mike, I have gone through a very similar experience. I think the only way to grow is by being by yourself for a bit. Once you start to see clearly, you will know exactly what to do. Family, and friends will always advise to break it off when things are tough because they care. They do not want to see the son, or grandson hurt. At the end of the day you need to follow your gut. Everyone can give you advice, but deep down you already know what you might do. Relationships are hard. They take a lot of work, and sometimes separation is the best, because you need to be alone to love yourself first, so you can love someone else and that is a very hard thing to do. If you know in your gut it is true love, and you feel she deserves a talk, then maybe when you are in a better place where you can have an actual healthy conversation, ask her out for coffee or something casual, and speak. Feel it out, do not jump into it, talk. All relationships are different and it isn’t fair when people tell you it is suppose to be a certain outline, because it is all different. Some relationships start rocky and end up beautiful, and some are roller coasters, but just because things are horribly rough at one point, does not mean it cannot be fixed. It just takes a lot of growth and maturity. You both have to admit you are both wrong, and work and build. You have to be honest. It is hard, and it is scary, but what is meant to be is meant to be, and you never know, maybe you will end up back together and truly start a different journey in your relationship, making it healthy, or maybe a great friendship will come out. You might meet someone who is truly for you, but do not right away dismiss things, and search for something better, because sometimes the “better” is the same person just a little grown up and ready for a positive change, and chance.
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