Anita,

I have since looked into mindfulness and it is very similar to some teachings I have received before.

What would your advice be to regain control of your thoughts? See at this moment I am not in control of my thoughts and they are dark and depressing and I feel like it is stopping me from getting anything done. I want to regain control of my thoughts and I want to feel the drive to find a job (as I am currently unemployed) and start earning so I can do things with my life.

I feel like I have always lacked a drive or motivation to get things done and I want this to change but once again I do not know how to do this.

many thanks Anita your replies mean a lot to me.

Hi Anita

Thanks for the words of wisdom you are giving me I appreciate it.

I believe that I want to help people and I enjoy the feeling of helping others but I do not know what field I could do this in and feel satisfied and become successful. I have tried many things in my life but I still don’t feel a sense of belonging in any particular career. I am getting to an age now where my friends and peers are all moving towards their goal but I still don’t have a goal that I am driven towards. My question is how can I speed up this process and start moving forward in my life. I no longer want to stand still in my life.

I have my trip to Canada to look forward to but like I’ve said before I am extremely worried about coming back home after 2 years in Canada and being back in this position. What is it I can do to avoid this from happening as it is honestly my worst fear right now.

I really appreciate the help you have given me Anita, I hope to hear form you again

Dear Anita,

I appreciate your advice and it was very relatable to me so thank you.

I want to be successful and I want to have a purpose in my life and for basically all of my life I haven’t had those. I want to be able to wake up in the morning and feel a sense of purpose and a drive to get up and do what I am meant to do in my life. But how do i find out what that is? I love so many things but there isn’t anything where I think oh I would love to do that for the rest of my life.

All I want is to get away, which I am doing by going to Canada, but I don’t know if I am going away because I just want to run away from the situation I am currently in. I don’t have anyone I can speak to about my situation that will actually care and understand and I am quite lonely because of this. I don’t really know what to do anymore.

I appreciate your time and knowledge Anita, I hope to hear form you soon

Dear Pip,

Thank you for your response I will make sure to check out the book you have recommended.

I understand what you have said when you say get to know yourself but I believe I am spending too much time in my own head. See I believe it is all well and good doing that but I feel like I am spending that much time in my head that I can’t actually think of anything positive and I am slowly getting consumed by negative depressive thoughts.

One of my main issues is that I am still in the same position I was in 3 years ago and not much has changed since then and I seem to have remained stagnant and not progressed any further in my life than when I was 18. I still live with my parents who I don’t have the best of relationships with as we clash often and I find it difficult to explain to them how I feel as they can’t understand why I don’t have the drive to work like “everyone else”. When in reality it isn’t that I don’t want to work its actually that I want to work but work in the career I am meant to be working in.

My dream right now is to move Canada which is happening in December. But I am on a 2 year visa and like I said before my fear is that when the 2 years are up I end up back in this position.

I know I cannot live my life in my home country of England and I know I must leave but I worry that without a degree and a good amount of funds behind me that I will end up back here and be stuck in this position for the rest of my life. I would love to have a degree at one point but I don’t have great grades and I regret dropping out of college twice. I want to get a degree in something where I know I will want to work in for the rest of my life. And that is the problem. I honestly couldn’t tell you if my life depended on it what my true passion is and what I want to do for the rest of my life.

I love lots of things, sports, music, psychology, business etc but if you asked me to pick one of those to stay in for the rest of my life I wouldn’t be able to decide. I know I want to help people and I have found working with kids rewarding but again it is something I couldn’t see myself doing for the rest of my life.

If you have any recommendations on how I can find out what I need to do with my life that would be incredible. I appreciate your time and knowledge and i hope to hear from you soon.