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Betsy Campbell

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  • in reply to: I am ugly,I hate it #145401
    Betsy Campbell
    Participant

    This breaks my heart, but I get it. I will be honest…at my ripe old age of 47 and recently divorced, when I walk into a room, I am drawn to the man who is confident and interesting. Not the best looking one. I think we all have an appreciation for physical beauty. But that doesn’t make for a beautiful “growing old together” situation.

     

    Learn to love yourself and it will outshine your physical appearance. Anyone worth your time will see it.

    in reply to: His porn habit is hurting me #145399
    Betsy Campbell
    Participant

    Jessica,

    I really understand where you are coming from. I am in the middle of divorce now after being married 17 years (together for 20) and I found out, through a passing comment, that my husband watched porn regularly. Porn itself isn’t an issue when it is a shared activity. But when I found out he was watching it alone as a hobby, I felt completely inadequate. I was absolutely shocked at how bothered I was by it. I am progressive and all about “live and let live.” But the fact is, I will never look, sound or act like those women. This coincided with a drop in our own intimacy for a number of reasons. I never felt comfortable again knowing that (porn) was his standard or even (God forbid) his expectation and, honestly, that was the beginning of the end for us.

     

    I am not suggesting your situation is the same. There were so many other layers to the stinky onion that was my awful marriage, but that was a really difficult one to get over. And truthfully, we never got over it because I never felt like I would measure up to his porn star expectations. You all may be able to work it out. But I thought I would share with you my own experience with that. Because it was incredibly impactful.

     

    Wishing you the best!

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