Hey Craig,

My apologizes on misunderstanding your last post, English isn’t my first language and I’ve been under major stress lately. I guess I’m not really so sure what could I change within myself.. u guess how I handle stress and my emotions because of this. Yes, I am considering couples therapy next week. I just really dislike feeling like my relationship and our communication is falling apart because of me..

Anita: Thank you so much for the response, I absolutely do appreciate this.

Last night I slightly calmed down and attempted to speak about my issues with him. My problem is: I WANT to feel extremely comfortable within myself when he watches porn and find inner peace and never panic. However, tackling my recovery on my PTSD/anxiety, I’d prefer to NOT see his provocative images in the meantime so I can grow.

I discovered last night, however, that he finds this entire thing ridiculous and emotionally exhausting. He finds it silly that I “cry” over these meaningless issues and continued to stamp that “Don’t look, [my name]” thing as a joke. I understood his frustrations and acknowledged everything last night.. but I still couldn’t shake that him “trying to joke” (and purposely?) try to make me have a panic attack is super insensitive..

I’m considering speaking to my therapist that we do a couple session this week about this, because ridiculous as this is, how I feel is the problem and I’m trying to become a “porn positive” person, not attempt to control him. For now, I’m letting my thoughts and words collect before I approach him with this topic again..

• This reply was modified 7 years, 6 months ago by V.