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Chanel

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  • #148763
    Chanel
    Participant

    Dear Anita,

    Okay. I’ll experiment and trust my gut!

    My boyfriend is safe figure in my life. I am struggling quite a bit, however, because my healing is not his responsibility and I also cannot expect him to always reassure me or find my answers. This has led to many arguments in the past because asking him to fulfill the needs I cannot fulfill myself is unfair for him and me.

    While he tries to provide me as much support as he can, I ultimately need to change my own thought processes and behaviors. So, while it’s important to have safe relationships with people in my life, I also want to develop a secure relationship with myself, if that makes sense. But how exactly can you heal and become stronger by yourself? It seems vague and hard to detect any progress, such as when I’m meditating or journaling.

    Thank you!

    Chanel

    #148745
    Chanel
    Participant

    Hi Anita,

    Thank you for your thoughtful reply. I greatly appreciate your reassuring words and understand the consequences of your example. I wish to do psychotherapy but cannot due to financial reasons… do you have any advice as to how I can heal on my own?

    I have also been considering whether spending more time attaching and separating from my boyfriend (eg. visiting and leaving him more frequently) or spending more time by myself (eg. spending longer periods of time away from him) would better heal my anxiety. What do you think?

    Chanel

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