Hey GL:

Thank you for responding! My codependency displayed itself in both ways: I dropped everything to care for him, and wanted him to do the same for me. From the very beginning of our relationship he never had any issue with telling me no. Which is good. He did what he could always and always let me know he loved me.

I fear no one will love me in the way he did, no one will be there for me consistently, no one will ever want to date/marry me. I feel like being in a relationship is my purpose and without that I feel hopeless.

Dear Anita:

He doesn’t want to be in a relationship at all because he said he felt like he lost himself in our relationship. He wants to take time to find himself again and focus on his career. He is open to a friendship, but I am not open to that yet. He is able to conceal his romantic feelings for me, whereas I am not. He does want me in his life and I want him in mine, but not if we aren’t on the same page be it friendship or otherwise. It hurts too badly to be around him if we aren’t together as a couple because I am still holding onto those feelings.

I know I need to heal from codependency, and I could tell I was projecting upon him. Which is another reason I pulled away. His main focus right now is his career, and my main focus has always been relationships. I hope that makes a little more sense?