Hi! I am a Christian and my boyfriend of over 4 years is a Muslim. We are workmates and we see each other daily. We know each other’s family, but society cannot accept whatever feelings we have for each other.

A year ago, when he went to his country for a vacation, he was told by his family that he had to get married. When he came back, he told me everything. And we decided we were going to stop seeing each other by the end of 2018 as he needs to meet his “would-be” at the beginning of 2019. In order to escape from the pain, I decided to go for a long vacation. I at first didn’t have plans of coming back. I couldn’t bear not being with him. But my heart won, and I came back, on the day of his birthday. The same day I came back, everything seemed fine again. We couldn’t bear not talking and we continued with our relationship. But every minute, there is an ounce of pain, of doubt that anytime soon, he will be gone. But I continued.

We stopped again a few days before he got married. He came back a month later and I thought we were through. But again, it started. We loved each other and we couldn’t bear not being together. His wife was still in his home country so it wasn’t a problem. We would go out together, we would stay together, we would do everything normal couples would. We were okay. We were happy. We were in love.

But now, he is going home and when he comes back, he will be with his wife. We talked things through several times. We said goodbyes several times. But the problem never seemed to sink in until today. In a few hours, his flight is due. He will meet her. And he will be gone in my life forever. Last night, we had a very thorough conversation. We told we will still be friends, we will be there for each other, but we could not do the things we used to do. I don’t know how that is going to work out, and I am looking forward to it.

For now, I have to bear the pain of reminiscing our 4 year relationship. And at the same time think about how he is currently doing while he is in his country with his wife.