Dear Cherrymom, I could have written your post myself. I’m in the exact same situation. It is so hard to be in a situation where you do not know where you stand with someone from day to day. This is especially true where children are involved and you are living under the same roof. As I am sure it is with you, the situation is complicated. If it was all bad, it would be easy (well, not exactly easy but you know…) to walk away. However, I know he cares about me and we have had lots of good times together and still do. Yet, there is definitely an emotional distance between us. Like you, I am focusing on acceptance, gratitude, and finding the peace and love I seek within myself. I want very much for my son to grow up with his dad around so I am not prepared to be the one that walks away from this at least for now. I am working on accepting and being grateful for the friendship we have and living my life on my terms to the fullest extent possible. I am not staying with him out of fear of being alone. I do not mind being alone for the most part and I know I could find someone else if I wanted to… but I don’t. I may change my mind eventually but for now I am just taking it day by day and living in the moment. Just know that you are not alone Cherrymom. What your man is doing is not about you, it is about him. Whatever demons he may be tormented by … only he can slay them. You are powerless over them. Self improvement is an inside job. Good luck and thank you so much for your post. It has helped me to know I am not alone too.