Hello CS,

Thank you for such a generous message. It’s times like this when you realise the beauty of the internet, which can often be lost in the sea of social media cruelty. Tiny Buddha is a wonderful and sincere community, and I’m really grateful I have found this space. In many ways, adulthood seems to be a constant lesson in overcoming one’s anxieties. The stakes are raised as our livelihoods depend on our capabilities, so it’s no surprise that your work as a teacher and artist brings a lot of stress. I’d love to speak to you about the book, and if you could offer any help or support, that would be much appreciated. I love to connect with people, and I truly understand what it’s like to feel cut off, even when there are so many people around. Please send your email address, and we can take it from there.

Anita,

Thank you for your thoughtful reply. I think your summary is correct. During this process, I’ve been caught up in what I believe others think of me instead of embracing who I truly am. I’ve been trying to satisfy other people to the point of disappointing myself. I believe honesty and humility are key, and indeed this is why the original message, as well as this reply, is so easy to write. Here, I’m not thinking about what anyone else, their expectations or their judgements. I’m solely focused on what I wish to communicate, and so writing feels as natural as speaking. Even the act of writing the original post and pressing send was cathartic. Putting my fears out into the world wide web rather than a journal only I can see was helpful. It removed the secrecy and shame that have become all too familiar. It gave me a reason to reach out and connect with other people rather than tormenting myself with thoughts of self-loathing. Today is my first day on this website. I decided to join because I found a post that was relatable and realised there was a massive community of people sincerely sharing difficult parts of their journey. It made me feel less alone. And this post, Anita has been really helpful. I am keen to get back to writing and implementing the honesty and humility I have lost sight of trying to be ‘super’.

Thank you Anita.