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January 11, 2021 at 1:56 pm #372621DocWolfParticipant
What happened to you as a child was awful, but you must understand, at 6 years old you are still in the monkey-see-monkey-do age range. Critical thinking and situational understanding are not yet developed. In fact, it is only after 7 years old that a child begins to develop a sense of self that is independent from their parents. Your actions were nothing more than an imitation of the adults in your life. They modeled that behavior in front of an impressionable child who had no way of understanding that what they were doing was fundamentally wrong. You carry no guilt in this.
From a psychological perspective, when a child undergoes that kind of trauma their personality fractures. In other words, a portion of the personality splits away to encapsulate the event in order to protect you from the pain. Unfortunately, it seems that when this happens the portion that breaks away freezes in time, and doesn’t age or mature with the rest of your psyche. What this means (without giving a diagnoses, as that is not allowed here), is that you may have a six year old boy screaming inside of you to help them understand the trauma they experienced. It is this little boy who is begging for help.
Without overstepping the rules of this site, I would suggest you reach out to a practitioner of Neurolinguistics Programming. They are specialists in this sort of personality crisis, and can help you heal and reintegrate the little you inside who is crying for help. Until then the best thing you can do is to show that little you all the love and compassion that you can, because adult you does understand, and adult you is the best one to help little you understand.January 11, 2021 at 1:56 pm #372618DocWolfParticipant
I hope that I am not to late in joining this topic, but unlike the rest of the world, I believe you. I have come across a number of lycanthropes -or werewolves, if you prefer- in my time, and I can readily imagine the loneliness and isolation you must feel. I also believe your docility. In fact one of the werewolves I met was actually quite charming. Please do not give up hope. You are not crazy, nor are your critics, they are simply less experienced. One cannot hold that against them. Please reach out to me if you get this. You are not alone.