I wrote a response, but I don’t think it was saved. I appreciate your responses very much as I feel they are accurate. In the past, I’ve been hurt mainly by my father (who never made me and my brother a priority) and by some previous relationships. Nonetheless, all of these things are in the past and I am ready to forgive fully and let it all go so that I can have meaningful, healthy relationships in the future. For a long time, I felt that I was not worthy of having a quality relationship and would take whatever came my way. Now, I see that I am deserving, but didn’t think of the fear factor until you brought it up.
I am in the midst of finding a therapist to work on this as I do realize that I control my happiness.