Hi Violet! I can tell you really value relationships and you are thinking very logically and deeply about this one. You have already invested a lot of yourself and it seems you could be cultivating a long term relationship hete. You obviously have your head on straight – I think you will do great if you keep following what feels right. I know it’s hard since uou don’t have a role model (I can definitely relate ) but so far you are making wise decisions. Don’t be afraid to trust yourself. That being said, it is also wise to ask for guidance when you are unsure which you have done here. These are all positive things and I agree with Anita that a therapist might be helpful as well. My boyfriend and I have been seeing a therapist weekly since becoming more serious in our relationship and it can be helpful in many ways. Good luck to you both!