Hi S,

Thank you for your reply. You are right — focusing on ourselves is always the key, especially if we have co-dependent/care-taking tendencies. I can see myself getting wrapped up in his story and trying to fix or help, and I think it’s something only he can do for himself, if he wants to. It is difficult for me to come to terms with that, and also hard to let go, because I am scared he will meet someone else. I guess if you love something, let it go? It has been a brutal couple of weeks, but I am trying to keep in perspective — do I want the rest of my life to be in this state of turmoil? It’s hard to know when to throw in the towel or when to keep trying? It usually takes me years to find someone I connect with at this level, so I always seem to put up a fight to make it work. I also think that I don’t know how to have a relationship without a lot of drama.

You sound amazing and very smart!! I am sorry you are going through it too. My best wishes to you!