My heart goes out to you. It is clear that you have loved and cared for others. Now, it is time to love and care fully and deeply for yourself. Maybe you are not ready to forgive ? Trust yourself and ask yourself, ” What can I do right now to take care of myself “? Being “kicked out” of your home must have been very painful. You can spend years trying to figure out someone else’s behavior. Your ex was not thinking nor caring for you when he created this chaos. Perhaps he doesn’t even see or know you. He had an agenda and went forth to meet his needs without care or compassion for the mother of his children. That is his loss. You are now the priority. Put yourself first and foremost. You are worthy. You are valued. You have dignity and honor. Build friendships and a support network. Perhaps join a divorce support group, folks that can truly understand the journey you are on. Bless your new living space. Fill it with your light and love. Forgive yourself for ALL the feelings and thoughts that you have been experiencing. I read this quote ” Sometimes when things are falling apart, they may be actually falling into place” So, as you are on your healing journey; love yourself, be kind to yourself and ask for help, As you let go…what is ahead of you that you desire to grab on to ?
~ with compassion ~ christina