It sounds like you’re in a difficult situation, and it’s completely understandable to feel torn. It’s important to recognize that healthy friendships are built on mutual respect and understanding, and it seems like you’re feeling a lot of emotional strain from this relationship. Her behavior may be unintentionally draining or one-sided, and it’s okay to set boundaries around what you’re comfortable with in any relationship.

The sense of loneliness you feel when not in contact with her suggests that the connection might be more about comfort and routine rather than genuine emotional fulfillment. It’s normal to struggle with this feeling, but it might help to reflect on whether this friendship is bringing you more peace or stress.

Taking a step back doesn’t mean ending the friendship forever—it’s about reassessing what you need and how you want to be treated. It’s okay to prioritize your own well-being. If you choose to have a conversation with her, try expressing your feelings calmly and honestly. If that’s too challenging or if the relationship doesn’t improve, it might be a sign to distance yourself for the sake of your mental and emotional health. Surround yourself with people who value you just as much as you value them.

Take your time with this decision, and remember that it’s okay to put your needs first.