Dear Kiersten,

Everyone at some point or another, felt this burning sense of toxicity radiating from their parents. As of now, I feel extremely upset about my mother and her manipulative behaviour towards me, trying to guilt trip me into doing things that she views are right. While I feel upset, I once again cannot cut off relations with her just yet as she is still my monetary lifeline, so I completely understand how you feel. I just wanted to say, I chanced upon a peace by tsem rinponche a while ago, and if you ever face the same issues with your mother again, remember that you can always view her as a positive training to your character. I understand this may be difficult to accept, I myself am completely unable to wrap my head around trying to use someone who is hurting me to by benefit, but I hope that with time and practice both of us can get to a point where we are able to accept the things around us and understand what we can do to turn this relationship or situation around us. Ultimately, if we are unable to do so, that is also ok because our dharma practice teaches us that gradually we will be able to accept whatever happens to us because of our practice, and we will not feel as affected. Also know that karma will eventually come back to our parents if they are truly, and I mean truly, in the wrong. While we shouldn’t wait on the day their karma arrives, we should know that it isn’t our responsibility to change their character or cause them harm just yet. I know my response doesn’t really help, but I just felt really helpless about my own situation until I saw your post and felt that if my fellow practitioner can overcome this situation so can I. Thank you so much and may you have all the luck you need!