Hi. I am new to these forums and this is my first post. I see so much wonderful support and encouragement here. I hope to be able to offer the same for others as well. I am posting because I am having a really hard time accepting that my ex husband of 24 years left me for the woman he was seeing while we were married and is now about to marry her. His family, who I still love, has seemingly accepted this woman so easily. It’s hard for me to comprehend this given their strict Catholic background. I honestly thought that after our divorce was finalized my ex and his mistress/girlfriend would break up. Instead, it seems as though he is truly happy. I realize that things aren’t always as they seem. I want to get to a place in my heart where I can fully forgive him and even be happy for him. I also wish to not care so much about what he is doing in his life. Some days, I feel as though I can. Then, I learn through our grown children that he is going to marry this woman and that his family is happily spending time with her, etc. It seems that all my months of working on myself and learning from my mistakes and growing as a person are momentarily undone. I feel as though I’m right back in the throes of devastation when my ex first kicked me out of our home and asked for a divorce. That was a little over a year ago, the day after Mother’s Day, 2012. I see areas where I’ve made great progress, and I try to focus on them. But, the pain comes in excruciating waves that never seem to end. Once again, I have trouble eating and sleeping. I’ve lost 5 pounds in the last 2 days. I know that setbacks in the healing process are normal. Healing is by no means linear. But, I didn’t expect to feel the intensity of grief that I felt initially after all this time. I spend time alone meditating and reading and working on making me the best version of me that I can be. I have friends and family to turn to, and I’ve begun dating and getting out into new social circles. I’ve lost a lot of weight and feel better about myself than I have in many years. But, it’s hard for me to accept that he is happy after the devastation his infidelity has caused. He was exceedingly cruel to me through the separation and divorce process. He seems to be less so now, but still it’s apparent that he doesn’t really care what happens to me. I guess I am still baffled by how someone who supposedly loves you and has for nearly 30 years can suddenly and without warning dispose of you and move on with someone else. Any thoughts, ideas, or suggestions are very much appreciated. I want to get to a point where I can weather each new revelation with more grace and acceptance and not feel as though I’ve gone back to square one. Kindest regards, Kim