There’s a great Rumi quote for this. He alludes to a lawsuit we produce in our mind’s eye giving all our evidence for the case, but come up lacking when it’s found there is no evidence. I’m not saying abuse and trauma is the hand of God teaching us, but there’s something to be said for the Spirit of the universe taking our trauma and working it toward our good. For me, there are three reasons a self-existent being makes a host for its own consciousness to reside in for the purpose of random suffering.

1) Direct fellowship with others (yoga is union)
2) Sense of Mortality (paired with losing a loved one we had fellowship with, this is the direct development of love and compassion.
3) Sense of Imperfection – Without this, no value of perfection could be known. Same with mortality and loss. What good is a mansion if you’ve never lived in squalor?

Read Rumi, then consider what we get after this life of suffering from liberation into a vast universe.

RUMI

I am amazed at the seeker of purity
who when it’s time to be polished
complains of rough handling.

Love is like a lawsuit:
to suffer harsh treatment is the evidence;
when you have no evidence, the lawsuit is lost.
Don’t grieve when the Judge demands your evidence;
kiss the snake so that you may gain the treasure,
That harshness isn’t toward you, O son,
but towards the harmful qualities within you.

When someone beats a rug,
the blows are not against the rug,
but against the dust in it.
-Rumi the Sufi – Masnavi III

What three things are promised by the relative suffering of our lives after the dust in the wind settles?

1) Fellowship with Source
2) Immortality
3) Perfection

Although the Buddhists and a few other traditions say no purduring self, the essence of our journey is what they refuse to tell you. We are being prepared for an inconceivable future that must be self-discovered from the journey. No one can inform you of this. It’s an internal realization, which any good teacher knows. It’s the reason for silence once the conversation reaches this point. Your little self here won’t survive, but the larger self is being made from this life. That’s my view anyway.

[quote quote=446575]On Survivors and Survival—

Surviving ongoing childhood trauma—what falls under Complex PTSD (C-PTSD)—is an experience shared by so many of us. Those untouched by it may be the minority, the lucky few. In my real life, I don’t know anyone untouched by it. Every adult I know carries the weight of C-PTSD, and here, in these forums, it’s no different.

Our world is a complex mess of PTSD.

Like a wild fire of PTSD.

If you are reading this, do you know anyone in your life who is alive and is NOT survivor of C-PTSD?

Anita[/quote]

Write down what you want in a partner and your intention that it will find you soon. All room for the universe to engage with this and give you something unexpected. We don’t realize the power in our written words, even your words here is this same connection with the collective. The universe abhors a vacuum. All emptiness will be filled, which is why the primary word meditation is a synonym for cultivation. Once you create a recess, the universe simply fills it with a gym or pearl. Trauma does this every day.

A good example of this is learning. Anyone who seeks an answer to anything receives the answer from within. You already contain the entire cosmos. Creating an empty spot is allowing the universe to fill the void of ignorance in this case. For you today, it’s an empty space of longing. Express this in written words, and place in your purse / wallet as a reminder to read every so often.

We did this before moving out of one house and into another. That’s a real story I could tell that’s fantastic. We sold the house in 2 weeks and were living in the new house within a month and half. What we wrote on paper happened to the letter. It’s not magic. It’s heartfelt intention, but intent is by design. Take it upon yourself to design the outcome, but leave room for the unexpected in your words. The universe knows you better than yourself. Why? You are ancient, but come here for a temporary life for a reason. Your longing is likely that reason reaching to the next chapter. It’s intuitive. Trust is the gateway. The book of life is co-created.

In my life, I’ve dealt with swinging emotions on a daily basis as a music teacher for 28 years. In any given day, I would come into contact with 600 kids and often their parents / administrators. Juggling the swinging emotions is what originally pushed me into the desire to start a meditation practice and personal development. Not only was I healing my own emotional turmoil, but I was studying the same problems in my students. It occurred to me this is simply identity crisis (wrong view in Buddhism). The one (maybe only thing) that really pushed me to see clearly was this simple aphorism: The one you are looking for is the one looking. This was the first big step for me learning the center of being for the human experience. Everyone I came in contact with at school was a reflection of me (the same me in them).

After realizing this unity of identity in everyone, my new view then immediately healed my nature. Around the time I realized this, I was learning about the three jewels of Prajnaparamita (perfection of Wisdom) from the Diamond Sutra (Prajnaparamita Sutra). From most eastern sutras, there is a simple idea that we all suffer from the common three non-virtues (there are 10 in total).

Wrong View (who am I)
Wrong Nature (why do I suffer)
Wrong Desire (caused by the first two)

As they say, if you work on one, you fix them all (including the other 7). For me, it was identity realization, or the fact that the one I was looking for is the one looking (in everyone). This then allowed me to realize my full compassion for others and get over my own sense of identity crisis. From there, it was cultivation (synonym in Sanskrit for Meditation). The path I discovered is Meditation (Empty out), Contemplation (breath in) and Service (breath out). My new nature from watching the breath was a realization that breath is not simply air, but emotions, food, thoughts, media and so on. My real hindrance in life was that my breath was the roadblock to my nature. Once nature is fixed by identity realization, then desires change. This is the moment of Prajnaparamita, or Prajna (wisdom) Paramita (well done). The turning point in every seeker’s life.

As they say, when the student (you) is ready, the master (also you) appears. Like music, it’s practice. For me, I gained mastery over teaching just before moving on to the next place in my life. Life has a funny way of taking away the thing you wrapped your identity around so it can give you something much better. The emptying out part is hard, but the doors it opens are what brings trust. In the end, trust is the problem.

My favorite Rumi quote: “Live as if the universe conspires in your favor.” Because it does. From the perspective of the Tao, this is Wu Wei (effortless action). Once you realize you are not acing alone, but the entire universe of enlightened beings are assisting you, then you become fearless with trust. We are never alone. Identity is everryone using Karman (Kar (action) Man (mind)). Mental action is collective, synchronistic and connected.

The one you are looking for is the one looking. Love only recognizes itself.