Hi Sylvie,
I am so sorry you are going through this-You’re brave for ending it. It has been 2 years since things ended with my narcissistic abuser. It is nowhere near a normal relationship ending. It’s an incredibly unjust situation, often with no support system. You simply will never, ever get him to agree that he’s done anything wrong, or admit that anything was a big deal. I did something akin to radical acceptance. There was too much to think about, too many things that were deeply wrong and unfair. I had to accept everything as it was and move on. It was also difficult finding a therapist versed in narcissistic-type abuse. I felt very alone and flawed. Go no contact with him, find survivors online.
Jen