I haven’t met a lot of other people with borderline mothers (or parents) so it’s helpful to hear from those who have that in common with me.  I struggle a lot with self-esteem, relationships, and various other interpersonal parts of life, and it is valuable to me to start to understand where these patterns originate and what my responses to certain situations mean.   For example, most of my friends had easier childhoods than I did, so when I say I feel bored of my boyfriend they say it’s obviously time to breakup.  For me, it’s not so obvious, because I know I have self-destructive tendencies and trouble trusting/deeply connecting/having healthy relationships, in large part because of what I experienced growing up. i don’t want to sell myself short, but i also don’t want to keep breaking up and starting new relationships over and over because  I am not recognizing that there is something wrong with me.  so, the perspective of people who had similar childhoods is extremely helpful.

Peggy, thank you so much for your thoughtful and thorough response.  It is so helpful! I truly appreciate it