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Lola

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    Lola
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    I have been on this website a few times under a few names (due to losing emails and passwords..uh-oh haha), and would just like to say, sadly I did come on here to use the relationship forum and I know people may like it to be used for more questions etc than just ‘help me’. However, I have found this forum the most helpful and insightful guidance through this hard time (Especially Big Blue- you have been great in any posts I have posted, keep up the good work, the world needs more helpful and thoughtful people like you).

    few things said above have rang very true to me ;

    “When we forgive, we disentangle. Even if its just the hope of a future forgiveness, let the seeds stay present. It keeps the grief from festering.” – I found this really is key to moving on, not only in relationships with partners/boyfriends etc, but also to helping maintain a sense of stability within a family – we all are different, we’re going to disagree at some point -.

    Also, I really liked this too “Try not to feel loss for a person who so readily was willing to discard you as it only proves they loved you conditionally. Look at the circumstances of your relationship: would you really want to continue investing your heart and spirit into something that required several boxes to be ticked indefinitely?” – this really made me think because I sadly am the one who has made my relationship come to an end by moving out. So, for a moment I considered the idea that maybe I was the person loving conditionally… but then with a little further reading and thought I realised I have been trying to tick those boxes for the last 3 and a half years.

    Anyway, the point of my post was that, yes people posting out break-up and their break-up woes, but I just wanted to drive it home how well everyone is doing and what great advice and comfort I found within this site. Things come and go, and the break-up influx may come to an end soon, but try not to shun those who come here to talk about their relationship problems. They came here (well I did) because I wanted an unbiased opinion of my situation from some very insightful, intelligent and aware people. And I got it. It may be boring to regular users, but the people posting have very real feelings and they’re trusting this open forum with them. It’s an honour, not an annoyance.

    Keep up the good work.

    Lola. x

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