Anita,

Wow. Very helpful. I have actually thought about that a couple if times, but to have someone say it..

Thank you, thank you very much.

Hi Mike,

It was very comforting reading the story of your friends, especially since it offered his side of the story as well. So I want to thank you so much for sharing it with me and for you entire response really.

its time for you to explore unless you whole heartedly love this person and want to work things out. Now this is where it hurts the most… Throughout the relationship, I’ve have also had my doubts as well, and the doubts were sooo tiring as I would often overanalyze the relationship and my feelings. Because this was (well it still is, but past tense seems more appropriate) my first love and I was always aware of it. I would sometimes be tormented by the thought that maybe this love isn’t actually that real and I’m just blinded my the magic and butterflies and blah blah of a first love. But despite these doubts, I was so happy that sometimes i would cry, was so grateful for having the chance to love somebody this deeply. Because he was just so great, he inspired me to be a better person and I grew so much since I met him. Of course, I was perfectly aware of his flaws, but would accept and deal with them with care. Maybe it was silly, but that excitement would just hit me. So now I don’t know what I feel or even felt. Is he really that sweet person I knew? Probably not, since he thought he could manage the situation the way he did. But the fact that I cannot know for sure, the possibility that we would actually be so happy together kills me.

I don’t know what I should do if he ever contacts me for a make up. Or maybe I know, just don’t want to accept it..