These cats are like your family and a part of you. Of course you are very upset and miss them. This is totally normal and expected. The twist of being allergic complicates things, but is manageable if you are willing and committed to the following. 1. get an air purifier, a really good one, hyperallergenic, and keep the filters refreshed according to the manufacturer’s warning. 2. take an allergy symptom pill that works for you and that your doctor agrees will help manage your symptoms. 3. you may elect to not have them sleep in your bed with you or have a cat free room, keeping the doors shut, and then sleep in there. this will give you and your body a chance to rest and recover from the pet dander. Lastly, there are shampoos you can get to keep the cat dander to a minimum. it goes without saying that you will need to vacuum often and don’t have a bunch of carpeting for the dander to settle into. hard wood floors, or tile floors are easy to wash and disinfect, cleaning off the dander. If you are not willing to commit to all of these steps, and I get it that it is a ton of work to commit to for the next 15 + years of the cats life, then leave the cats with family, and visit them when you can. You will be sad, but you and the cats will be more comfortable. Love and Light, Mara