Hello,

First, you are very brave letting go something that doesn’t serve you well on the long run. I remember when I went through a rough break up, and yes, mornings and evenings were the worst for me too. Cause that’s when you are left alone with your own thoughts. Wasn’t the healthiest way of dealing with it at the time maybe, but what I did is I tried to ‘reduce’ my mornings and evenings with busy schedule. I’d start doing something as soon as I woke up, and came home late exhausted. Called every friend I haven’t called in years, and some of those renewed friendships still last. The pain was horrible, so I practically said ‘yes’ to activities that I would have never tried before (mountain climbing, parties till 4am). I am not saying it solved the issue 100% but it was the only thing that made me feel better for a while.
I know how hard it is, and whatever people say to you can’t heal the pain and make things better. But it’s good to know that there are people around. Hearing your words, answering your posts, being there for no reason but your company.It’s good to slowly realize that love and joy can be found in different forms and places but that person. Only time will gradually heel the pain and the day will come when you’d feel ready to put those memories in a box in the basement. In the meantime it’s ok to remember sometimes and feel sad… just don’t stay in that mood for too long. Go out, do something… help someone, find someone to help you. You need to love yourself too, as you loved that person.

It’s wonderful you want to make some positive changes, and I am sure you’ll manage to accomplish your goals. I am on that road for some time, some things have worked out… some things are still on the waiting list 🙂 I see a lot of frustration with yourself in the post.. Whatever you do, just let it be from the heart. It seams that you are pushing yourself too hard, and you have high expectations from yourself, which can lead to just more stress and anxiety. You’ve been through a lot, and first give yourself some break.Your lifestyle wasn’t built over a night and building a new one will also take some time. And sometimes just a simple walk in the nature and having a coffee with a dear friend is better for your mind that forced yoga poses, demanding exercises etc… Start small. Do one little thing today that makes you happy.

It’s important to work on spiritual, mental and physical level though… You can read all the inspiring books, but if you eat unhealthy, and sit all day long in front of the laptop, not much will change. I know many people who re-post inspiring quotes, follow Oprah, Louise Hay.. understand the Law of attraction, and still they struggle will illness, depression and problems regularly. Your mind understands the logic, but still your body and soul are hurting and they need attention too.

When I had depression, i started with the spiritual part. First thing I did, I started ‘smudging’ (burning sage).. That will clear your space a bit from all the cluttered negative vibrations. After that I learned about methods of visualizing, meditation, raising your vibration. One thing at a time. If you are religious that might help too.. Start something, anything. Getting a sage a burning it, was simple and quick enough for me to start..

And a lot of the ‘healing’ starts in the supermarket. 🙂 If you don’t wanna eat it and it hurts you, just don’t buy it. It’ as simple as that. You don’t have to deny every guilty pleasure you had from tomorrow, I still eat chocolate, french fries sometimes. For example, Don’t buy artificial juices anymore starting now… that’s 4 spoons of sugar lees per day. Trust me, that’s more than enough for start. For lunch next week, try a new simple healthy recipe. Give it a chance and if you like it you’ll cook it again. Introduce new habits gradually.

Stay away from toxic people 🙂 They hurt your body more than sugar 🙂

And don’t be hard on yourself. Only the things you do with joy will bring real benefit. Of course, sometimes you have to push yourself a bit, just don’t let the pushing be your biggest daily routine. Never forget to love yourself and give yourself some credit.

Just take baby steps, and be happy each time you do! And don’t be frustrated if some things you try won’t work out. Everyone responds differently..