thanks again – it is all “understandable” but i am sick over what i did – and if it wasn’t for the last text i sent, we still might be friends – i paused before sending it and then thought – oh it is “funny” – but less than a minute a later, i was panicked over how far astray i had gone – and i see i already said that so now i am repeating myself!! – a world of hurt here for certain – part of me feels if she took our friendship more…i don’t know…deeply…she would forgive me…or at least we would have talked about it – she sent a text a few days after the text i sent saying she accepted myapology but we should not have any contact with each other – that really hurt as it drove home what i had done

thank you for the reply, Matt. you are spot-on on many topics here – the impatience angle is huge with me and i am working on that – i guess the challenge with the woman in this is she was a good friend before this and to have it cut off with no discussion between us feels rough – not to mention she is good friends with a number of people here at work so while i don’t see her, i hear of her and know others get together with her in groups i used to “belong to”….a hard lesson, indeed, and no doubt a slippery slope i was on – even if i was there alone (ie she might have been just flirting for fun) – i got to this ripe age without ever being in a situation close to this (oh sure, i mis-behaved in some relationships before but i was in my early 20s and the rules on both sides were “all is fair in love and war”) – like i said in my first post, what hurts most is that i i made a woman so uncomfortable she had to end contact