Hello Nana – I am sorry for what you are going through and the pain you’re experiencing.  I’m sure your BF is a “very good” guy, who just does bad things.   My guess though, is you wrote Tiny Buddha because you can no longer hide your doubts from yourself.  The veneer of your trust in him is cracking, and you don’t know where to turn.  You may be looking for validation “it’s going to be fine” or maybe for courage “break up with him!” to come from someone else because you don’t trust your own feelings.  My advice is to look deep, feel what you feel and make the appropriate choice.  Trust yourself.  Let it go.