Hi gypsystar7,
I read this and immediately felt like I needed a bit more context to fully understand the situation. First of all, how on earth can you be ‘best friends’ with someone who’s always ‘sort of annoyed you’?! Can you give us some examples? If you guys have been best friends for a few years, maybe this girl feels it necessary to demonstrate that through trying to give advice. There must have been some happy times in your friendship to be so close to this girl for a decent amount of time. Where did you guys meet, school / uni? Perhaps it’s a simple case of crossed wires and she genuinely believes her input is helping you.
On the other hand, those feelings of ‘tightness and nervousness’ should definitely not be ignored. If she really is hurting you, I’d say you need to take a deep breath and be assertive – however hard it might be. I’ve recently cut out a few toxic people from my life: quality over quantity really is the case with friends.
Maybe try communicating your frustrations and see if that changes anything.
All the best!