Dear Anita

Thank you for your reply, well I am very close to my parents, too close I would say sometimes, but to be honest, I am looking for love I want to get married and have kids or just spend my life with someone I love. With him I really loved him I accepted all his shortcomings, his dark side, everything! I am shocked that he broke up with me because I thought he was the one! Till now I still have a deep caring affection for him. I am not especially romantic or like (or know how) to express my emotions but I like to receive that affection you get from someone you love or feel that feeling, for example, get a cute message or knowing there is someone I can care for and I can think of and receive that care in return. However in my previous relationships when things were broken, when I knew they were behaving badly I would put an end, even if I am still in love in my mind it’s clear and I can move on; but with him it’s different he treated me like crap I know it, he broke up with me over something so small and I know I can’t rely on him but I still want to be with him and I don’t know why.

Dear Anita

Thank you very much for your reply it’s spot on, we didn’t talk about marriage in that same conversation but few weeks before yes. I mean I was clear and I said I can’t go on like this we need to decide where this is going etc… and he agreed that we should get married and he was even plaaning a suprise proposal (it was supposed to be a surprise but I found out), and during our call he said he loved me and then I asked him where is this going he said somewhere very serious and then we got cut off and he called back maybe 15 min later, brakes up with me in few minutes I couldn’t talk and he hangs up on me and that’s it.

He was very inconsistent with me many times, we agreed on this trip months ago he said he will free himself he will do whatever it takes and then last minute he can’t and I have to go. He did that last time and I accepted to go because he came to see me and I thought I should go but his excuse was the tickets are too expensive… and he insisted, he wanted me to come so badly I had to come earlier but when I was there he was sooo cold couldn’t hold his hand at first couldn’t kiss him, we didn’t go out that much, he bailed on me and disappeared for two days then he tried and fix his behavior but still I was so bored. He would either sleep or stay home watch Netflix maybe go out time to time and that’s it! When he came the first time in my hometown I took him out every night, went to fun places and even paid sometimes. When I came back I wanted to end it but he promised he won’t do it again and he has issues from previous relationships and the way he treated me during that trip was his biggest regret. So yes he was very inconsistent with his behavior.
The weird part is I know I don’t deserve this and I deserve someone who will love me consistently and be there, but I still love him and a part of me still wishes he comes back and changes but I know it’s not possible. Why am I feeling this?

Dear Anita

The first time he came to see me the second time I went and now the third time it’s his turn to come (from my point of view). It’s a bit complicated and long to explain but no they haven’t figure out that I was intimate with him.