Dear Anita:

Thank you for your reply and your empathy.

I am trying to give myself time to figure out if I am truly able to treat him right this time around. I think that I might need to take things slow, but I have realized that my behavior was unhealthy and unacceptable. I am currently working on fixing the factors that led me to being the way I was. I am realizing that I wasn’t very happy or well rounded during these past months. I have decided to move out from the place I am living (I live with an old lady who stresses me out and prevents me from being comfortable), I was taking classes that I didn’t enjoy and frankly didn’t interest me, and I had no other outlets or activities beside partying and drinking. I am looking forward to picking a sport up or perhaps yoga or meditation.

My fear is that I might be too late. I saw that he is back on dating apps. It hit me hard yesterday, but I am accepting that it’s normal for him to move on. I would like to ask for a second chance but fear that he has absolutely no reason to believe that he met a version of me that was stressed and frustrated, and in a less than ideal place to start a relationship.  I am happy to say that at the very least the breakup opened my eyes, and now I am being more honest to myself and to others. I just wish I could be the very best version of myself with him, now that I am actively working toward self-fulfillment.

I know that my chances for a second opportunity are slim, but I do not want to have any regrets. I am unsure if holding on to hope will hinder my well being in the long run.

Thanks again for your help,

Mar