I registered just to reply to this…. Just wanted to let you know that you are not alone! I have been going through this recently, but am further out of the woods than you at this point. Please, research both bipolar and gaslighting, you will see similarities to your situation.

How to recover and move on? It takes time and work. The pain lingers, but very slowly dissipates. Forgive yourself, and don’t use the words “fault” or “blame” anymore (for either him or you). In essence, it’s all irrelevant; it’s time to put it in the past and move on. Start thinking about who YOU are. He was defining who you were, but now it’s time for you to do that. Do not let him continue having any kind of power or influence over you. Take that power and influence back!

I don’t really have friends, either (just moved here), so I have joined some groups on meetup.com and am slowly getting back out there. It’s not easy, but it’s getting better.

You said “there’s no one in the world who adores me and wants to spend their time with me over anyone else….” YOU need to adore YOU and want to spend time with yourself.