Hi Anita!

Thank you. 🙂

The world was not good enough because it is not. I so often could perceive and witness cruelty and stupidity. Not necessarily in real life, even in movies, at school. Boys’ favourite game was to kill grasshoppers. They crushed them and kept laughing. I was horrified by the gratuity and the cruelty of those acts.

In any case, due to my childhood or not, here is where I am. And I’m lucid, I see the world for what it is. And it’s sad. What’s the point of even bother to try?

I’m just surviving, like a lot of us. I don’t remember last time I felt alive. But it sounds more dramatic than it is, I mean, I keep smiling, it is just I’ve given up hope and I don’t know where to head to to have it back.

Hi Anita!

Thank you for your answer. You brought up an interesting point, although a bit fatalistic 😉 but I don’t think is that. Slightly maybe. I don’t know anymore…

I try not to be blind and to be as objective as I can but is not always easy, but I don’t believe that my father is the “cause” since we were actually pretty rich when I was a kid, and he was just fine, he lost everything so start working hard in non very well  paid jobs. When I was younger I was not worried since my sisters were living nearby. Now everyone is gone and I’m seriously thinking about renting a house for me and my father, work six months, travel four, and so on. But this idea also makes me feel like a loser. I mean, come on, living with your parents  a at 38? Not to mention that I really don’t like the town where he lives.

Thank you again for reading me!

Are you feeling better now? How?